Stronger Than Depression

Chapter 7

Song: Welcome to the black parade by MCR

Two weeks before schools starts. My brain was thinking real hard, again.

This over thinking will kill me. Over the last week, since I wrote that, let's call it "an open letter to the world" that voice in my head kept on telling me that I should go out.

I don't like to go out in the world, I have huge anxiety attacks. But now I had this need to go out as I have never felt before.

So, OK. Let's go, but where?

So I started thinking. I had no idea where to go, so I googled a bit.

I saw that in the museum were bunch of stuff from Titanic! I LOVE TITANIC!

I love that ship so much, I'm a huge fan. This is great!

I'm going to see so many things that were actually on Titanic! I put on black and white plaid shirt, black jeans and black Vans.

This time I decided to let my hair down to change it for once. It was freshly washed and it smelled like apple.

I also put on just a little bit of mascara. I just hope I won't cry.

Also, this time, instead of the train, I took a bus ride. I left my house and started walking towards the nearest bus stop.

It was kinda windy today, so my baby hairs were going wild. I knew it.

I can't look normal even when I try to. I waited for the bus only two minutes.

When it arrived, I got in and found an empty place to sit. The bus had pair of chairs on each side of the bus, and I managed to find one that was empty.

I hate to ask people to sit next to them. I feel really awkward and scared.

I'm afraid to move. There was a plenty of people on the bus, and I prayed that no one asks to sit next to me.

But I guess things never go my way and I wasn't alone for much longer. On the next stop, more people came in and one boy about my age dared to ask to sit next to me.

What the heck? Guess who asked to sit?

That cashier gut from the music shop i was in few days ago. I honestly couldn't believe it.

But I think he doesn't remember me, he comes in contact with bunch of people. Also, I'm used to it, to be someone nobody remembers.

"Excuse me, is this seat taken?" He asked politely.

"Uhm...no." I turned my head to the window while he sat next to me.

Why did he have to sit right here? I know there isn't so much place on the bus.

We were riding and riding. I still couldn't believe who was sitting next to me.

I tried to keep calm and avoid him as much as possible and I started to believe that he doesn't even remember me. That's good.

But my belief didn't last long. He touched me on the shoulder. I turned my head around and took one earphone out.

"Excuse me, but is that BMTH blasting from your earphones?" He asked with a smile.

He didn't ask that in the "smooth way" like someone who just want to flirt with you, but like someone who just really loves BMTH. And that's good.

I was surprised that he asked me that and I said: "Yes! True friends!"

"Stab you in the front." He completed.