Flames {phan au}

*vanilla's contagious heart flutter*

Dan:

Sitting on the cold, hard concrete wasn't comfortable in anyway. But having Phil there, with his arms wrapped around my back was the feeling of something special. I had my puffy red stained eyes stuffed into his chest. Pressing heavily against his wrinkled blazer and colourful shirt. Inhaling his scent, something sweet and warm. Vanilla. Out of everything. It was vanilla. I dont want to leave this spot. I want to stay in his arms forever, and never leave. Me sitting curled up in his lap, absorbing all of his heat. His heat was enough to heal my bruises. None where plain as day, but they were there. I knew it. I also know when I look in the mirror later they will be there, glaring back at me reminding me of my mistakes.

"Are you sure your okay Dan?" He asked me. I didn't know how to respond. I didn't want to nod, but I didn't want to do the opposite either. I was conflicted. I sat and did nothing instead, but I don't think that was what he was expecting. Phil untangled his arms from me and started to stand up. I'm still sitting on the pavement, looking up at him. He plastered a smile on his face. Then took two steps, then paused and turned around to me.

"Well...aren't you coming?" He asked. Why did he want me to go with him? If I did go with him, where would he take me? These thoughts were spinning in my mind. I signed. I looked at his face that was full of confusion. Then I mentally face palmed myself, remembering I'm not with Pj. I'm with Phil. My cheeks went flush. He seemed to notice this and giggle. His laugh made my heart flip upside down. Fuck. When will this phase be over and done with. Phil is my friend, nothing more nothing less. The highest point he can get with me is best friend. That's it.

"Haha Dan, don't you remember? I have no clue what you just signed to me. But I'm guessing it was something like 'Oí mate where are we goin' Or something like that. I don't know what you sound like, so I created some voice for you. Based off of typical Reading accents, or at least I think it was accurate." Phil rambled, still laughing. Then I started as well. I mean my laughs were very soft, just below a whisper. They sounded really breathy and airy. You could never really hear the laughs come out of me. But to be fair, this is the first time in a long time I have a genuine smile and laugh. His perky, optimism was contagious. When Phil regained himself, he continued his previous thought.

"Well, anyways. I wanted to take you to my house. I know we literally just met and everything but, I feel like...I dunno...like we are already really good friends. What'da think?" He asked with a smile, of course. My heart started to pound. I haven't been over to anyone's house in 3 years. I mean people assumed I went over to Pj's house all the time but in fact I haven't even been over there in 3 years either. When I went through my...muting process...his mum and dad started to think I was really fucking weird so they said that Pj could hang out with me, but only at school. Well, it has to be that way until I start talking again. Which I have no desire or the drive for. I'm content, so what good would putting that effort into it, if you simply don't give a single shit. Exactly, waste of the little time we have left until we inevitably die and rot to nothing. I mean life's pointless, everything is. But that kinda makes us realize how blunt and bad-ass the universe is. But back to Phil's invitation. Let's think, my dad wont care, my brother is at Nan and granddads for the week, and...
I nod at Phil giving him my signal of approval.

"Yay! We're going to have so much fun..well I hope. I have a Ps1, Ps2, and Ps3. Along with an Xbox and stuff. So I mean we are pretty set on video games...I'm assuming you like video games?" He said, kinda indicating a slight question at the end, with the raising of his voice. I nod. I really do love video games. I became addicted a few years ago, then things happened. And I haven't played since. I watch Phil as he pulls out his phone and dials his mum, telling her I'm coming over, which seemed like a very good idea. I was anxious the entire way to Phil's house. What if his parents hate me? What if they don't understand? Or worse. They find out. But I haven't told Phil, so that would be impossible. Or would it?

A/N:
I hope you can sense the chapters getting better. I can promise this is going to be a shorter story than Polaroid Picture. That ones like a full on novel, but hopefully a good one. This ones going to be ending in a few chapters. But by a few I hopefully mean like between 3-6 but who knows with me, I get all caught up in the emotion and stuff so yeah. We'll see.

Bye
~M