Rejecting The Big Bad Alpha *COMPLETED & EDITED*

Chapter 38

Get ready for a big, revolutionary surprise at the end!

Play the song xx

~ Chels
Jordan's POV:

It had officially been a month.

A month since we went to Asher's funeral.

A month since I last got a glimpse of his spectral face.

A month since I last got to say goodbye to him properly.

I sat lazily perched on a swing hanging from a large tree out the back of Alexander's and my house. I usually like to come out here and which I gather my thoughts. I've been coming out here a lot more frequently. Thinking back on the sadness of the month, I have been thinking about one thing that isn't Ash. And thats, that I've been craving the most unusual things for a little while. Along with I've been throwing up every morning around 4.00am exactly.

I'm not quite sure why I've been doing this but I haven't told Alexander. Why might you ask? Well I don't want him to worry. He worries so damn much, even over such little things.

Like if I accidentally stub my toe or jam my fingers, it's as if he stop's the world just to make sure that I'm alright. he acts like I had two legs and an arm chopped off. I love him so very much but he can be a little over protective. It's almost as if he's practically wrapping me up in bubble wrap.

I swung my legs back and forth lazily on the swing, keeping my eyes closed as I leant my head agaisnt the thick rope. I still think of Asher. Everyday, every minute, every second. I miss his happy, bright, bubbly, funny features and I miss his hugs. I miss how even though he was a guy we always treated him like a girl, seens how he's pansexual he didn't mind any of it, he would even go shopping with us. When we wanted to show him some new clothes we could get undressed in front of him and he wouldn't really care.

I didn't even realize that a tear fell from my left eye. I quickly wiped it away. Sighing, I leant against the other side of the rope that held me and the swing up.

I've decided I've cried enough over Asher.

"I'm sorry about Asher." A soft voice spoke, startling me and making me nearly fall off of my swing. I whipped around in concern. When I saw who it was, a gentle breath flew out. My breathing had calmed as I watched a sad, sympathetic smile plastered on his handsome face.

My old friend Eli stood there, scratching at his arm awkwardly as Chelsea stood next to him. His girlfriend Eryn was walking down the back, chatting with Jess and Emma.

"Oh.." I breathed out and slowly got up from my swing, wiping my nose. I looked up at the blonde haired blue eyed boy.

He was recently in Chicago with Eryn for his dancing tribute. He had gotten offered an important part in a dance duo with some famous person who I don't exactly know.

"It's ok." I breathed out and looked down, playing with my hands and biting my bottom lip.

"I really did want to come to the funeral, we both did." Eli spoke as he wrapped a lazy arm around Eryn's waist once she finally got down to us. She smiled sympathetically at me. Chelsea's eyes were downcast, emotions rivaling and swimming in them.

"Well I'm glad you guys could make it, it's been a while." I say, leaning forward and giving Eli a hug. After a good 5 seconds I swapped and began giving Eryn a hug. She patted my back and we both let go. Eryn's bluey greeny eyes mingled with a few emotions, some sad, some sympathy a bit of everything really. Her slight freckled nose twitched.