Pulse

7

DAKOTAS POV

Jenna's grandparents "farm" isn't what I thought it would be.

It's literally a mansion in the middle of no where.

Niall hooks his arms around me, and we all (Harry and Jenna, Leigh, Zayn, And Liam) grab chairs and formed a circle around the fire pit. I sit on Nialls lap and ignore a look from Leigh who's surprisingly by Jenna instead of Zayn.

Leigh and Zayn got in a car accident, some time ago. I visited Zayn but I don't think he knows, it wasn't too bad of an accident but when Jaeden called me and told me I started to panic. I don't know why but I was a mess. I came and left the hospital. I can't breathe in hospitals. He and Leigh weren't there for too long just two nights. I wonder what led him into the ditch. I wonder what he was thinking about. Police said he just got off the road, no texting or any distraction. Just landed in a ditch.

Thank god, it was a small ditch, and thank god he wasn't hurt too badly.

I want to talk to him but I can't do it, I really can't. I know his wanting to talk to me too but I like him too much and he likes me and we just can't happen. If I care enough about him and he knows that I do, I will go crazy because it's a fragile thing to invest energy into someone...giving them complete access to you and allowing to either love or ruin you or both. It's often both. Leaving you more miserable then you ever were before.

That's why, I'm here. Sitting on Nialls lap, who doesn't care about me enough. And doesn't care of how much I care about him. He can't hurt me, he can't ruin me, he can't make me go crazy because he doesn't have the power to but Zayn does.

Although lately Niall would hug me longer, kiss my forehead often, and sometimes I would catch him looking at me with longing eyes. Either he wants to have sex with me or he likes me too.

I chose to go with the whole sex thing. It makes things easier in my head for me.

"Whatcha thinking about sweets?" Niall says facing me.

I smile at him and kiss him and he hungrily accepts. He pulls away slightly, inches away from my face. "What are you doing for break?" He asks. I furrow my eyebrows and think. "I don't think I'm doing anything. How about you?" I ask.

He puts a string of hair behind my ear and it feels too much like a movie. Expect his hands aren't soft, and his eyes are full of admiration and sadness. He said something a while ago but I couldn't hear it so when I ask, "Do you like me Niall?" he's surprised and caught off guard.

"Yeah. Yeah, I think I like you." He smiles and kisses me.

No. No. No. "You just want to fuck me don't you?" I quietly say, so no one else hears me.

He thinks, "Sometimes I do, but that's not why I like you."

Before I can say anything else, Jenna pulls me up and hands me a sparkler that's lit and I laugh. I stand up and so does Niall, joining everyone who's now up and jumping and laughing.

Music is playing and joints are being lit and Nialls confirmation completely blows with the wind.

----x----

"I don't think we've properly met, My names Liam." He bends down as if I'm the queen and I laugh. Then he joins me on the steps of Jenna's Gparents steps.

"Im a realllllly drunk Dakota. Hi" I smile.

Everyone's already in the house, it's too cold to sleep outside. I needed a smoke, and Jenna said she didn't want cigs and blunts to reek the house.

"Hey, really Drunk Dakota" He laughs. It's dark and I can barley see the outlines of his face but his body is very built.

"Thank you" He nudges his shoulder against mine. "I said that out loud huh? Well it's true" I smile, even though I'm 100% sure he can barley see me either.

"Are you saying your truthful?" He asks and nod. "Then why don't you act like it?" I cock my head, "Excuse me?" I hold my head up high even though it desperately needs to be laid down. Bad. Headache.

"Hey. I'm trying to be your friend. Im truthful too and observant. See, Niall, Harry, Louis, Zayn and I have been friends since elementary. Never left each others side. Zayn likes you and I suppose you know this, and I can see you like him too. I saw you with Niall and I knew it was to spite Zayn hence why he hooked up with Leigh. It wasn't a problem till Niall constantly talked about you. Stopped talking to the girls at school and started really liking you. Now Niall and Zayn like you, but you only like Zayn and your not being fair."

I looked at him with glazed eyes, his words hurt, sunk into my skin like burning irons. I knew everything he has said, but thing is he said them. Confirming the truth. And nothing hurts more lies and the truth, how does that make sense?

ZAYNS POV

"I fucked....up...I know....Im sorry....Zayn....No....Niall.....Im sorry....Im horrible.....I never met to hurt you Niall........I fuck everything up....." I hear Dakota say. Niall and I were gonna go have a smoke, he wanted to talk to me. We haven't talked in weeks. Not since Dakota. I was afraid I lost him. But here we are behind the screen door to the porch where Liam and Dakota (without our knowledge) were sitting.

She's crying now. And she's also drunk. She seemed to be sad tonight, but she's always sad. I...we all never know why.

Liam hugs her and Niall turns to me, and finally breaks the silence, quietly he says, "Uh, go out there." And he turned on his heal and I touched his shoulder, "Niall." I started to say but he shrugs me off and shakes his head. "It's fine. Kiss her, she really wants you to kiss her." He says without turning and keeps walking.

So I turned backed to the screen door, and finally opened it and did what he said to do and she never pulled away.