THE CRIMINAL FILES ~ Tragedy at its Finest

S I X

/I just wanna' stay in the sun, where I find - I know it's hard sometimes. Pieces of peace in the sun's peace of mind. I know it's hard sometimes. Yeah, I think about the end just way too much, but it's fun to fantasize. On my enemies who wouldn't wish who I was...but it's fun to fantasize/

"How long have you and your husband been married, Mrs. Harris?" Jack asked.

Black mascara tears ran down her pale face creating strips of clumpy liquid. Her platinum blonde hair was pulled into a tight bun that rested on top of her head. "T-ten years." She sniffed.

I watched her and Jackson through the mirror, staring at her intently watching the way the tears lined her face.

I let Jack take this one on by himself because of three reasons. One, I had too much anger boiling inside of me which could lead to a compromised case. Two, Jack needed to learn to do this on his own. And three, I needed to start that report about Jackson.

It was something the leader of the team {me} had to do almost monthly. At the end of every month, or every other month my superiors asked for a report about how Jackson was in the field, in the lab, interrogating...blah, blah, blah. This was because they had to keep up with his progress and track it. However, it wasn't really Jack they cared about, it was how he was learning. You see, there have been minor complications in the past between me and my higher-ups. It never led into a physical altercation, but I have said some...things, I do regret saying. And with the occurrence of these...misunderstandings, have led to many disbelieving superiors. Some, don't believe that I can control my own team, and the majority of those over-react and call in Internal Affairs to put an investigation forward of me and my methods. But time and time again I have proved that I am a better FBI Agent than most of the Agent's residing in Quantico.

And, the arguments are never about personal effects - but creative differences. I know there's a certain way we've done things and we've defended many lives, but that doesn't mean the Federal Bureau of Investigation is perfect.

We have our moments where we could do better, and some of us could certainly improve our people skills, and so I've requested for my team to be freelance. Almost. Where they had the right to work under me on cases without someone tagging along and watching our every move, keeping us in check. Because that is what happened in the first few months of me being there.

Mr. Maxwell, was his name. He was a superintendent of my department and he was assigned to follow May, Owen and I wherever we had a case.

May didn't exactly mind because she though Alan was cute. Owen didn't like it because Maxwell beat him at cards - whereas I hated him because my bosses didn't believe in me. It was a trust issue that I had went to them about, complained, and was put on leave for a week or two. But all the times I've been "in trouble" {which is saying it in an much easier fashion} has been because I thought my team could do better without someone breathing down they're necks. My boss had agreed to this, if, I could prove someone on the team was able to fill in that spot. And so I did.

And now here I was, in charge of May, Owen, myself and now Jack. Here I was making the risky calls, the moves that shouldn't of been made but had to be. Here I am, the leader. The word tasted bitter on my tongue - but of course it did.

I haven't been written up in a long time, almost three years. And I felt like the biggest hypocrite I've ever known. I am, what I once hated. So, does that mean I hate myself? Possibly. I have definitely hated some of the decision's I've had to make, even if someone assured me it was the right thing to do.

Moving through the people, I shut the door, closing myself in the room where we were working which had no one in it, and opened up my laptop signing into a new document.