A Hint Of Violetta

Abuse, Alcohol and Death

~2 years later~

I felt the pain burn at my side.
He was using a stick today. Hard, strong, wood.
It hurt. But I'm getting used to it. It's like a numb burn.
It hurts, but it also doesn't.
I just want the mental pain to go away.
I'm 8 years old... should I really be experiencing such horrible things?
I don't know.
I don't care.
I just want something.
Something to make it stop.
To make all of it stop.
"STOP!" I scream. And he does. But only for a second. I feel his hands grip around my hair and yank me upwards, till I'm dangling in the air.
"How dare you speak to me, you foul... little...rat." Between each word, I feel him scratching at the end of my half arm. It burns... so badly. He lets go and drops me to the floor. My body spasms and I curl up into a ball. Shivering. Shaking. Crying.
I feel like I'm dying.
                                                                      *******

I wake up to see father stomping ur the door, a bottle in his hand.
Back to the bar, I think to myself. Not surprising.
Once he is gone, I sit up slowly.
It's 5:00pm, Aqui will be working on dresses, Tema will be making dinner, Maddi-Green will be photographing bees in the forest, Blanc will be on his way home, and the others will all be doing their own thing.
What is it that daddy uses to make the pain go away?
All that liquid in those odd shaped bottles...
I quietly creep upstairs and slip into fathers room.
There are pictures of a tall pale woman, with big lilac eyes, and long purple hair.
Mother.
Aqui says I look just like her, the only difference is the eyes. Mine are still purple, but a heap of grey is mixed in with it.
A tall, black cabinet catches my eye. I walk closer to it and stare at all of the bottles. Each filled with liquid. Some clear, some brownish, some are black.
I open the slim double doors slowly, and reach out for a bottle shaped like a skull. The stuff inside is clear.
I remove the cap and take a huge swig. It's horrible. I can feel it burning my throat. Tears start falling from my eyes as I continue drinking it. The taste is unbearable. And the strong smell hurts my eyes.
I keep drinking until half of it is gone. I put it back on the shelf and sway. My legs feel like jelly... I can't move my arm.
I'm on the floor now.
I can't see.
I can't move.
I can't scream.
I can't feel anything but numbness.
Is this what death feels like?
How should I know. I'm only 8.
I try to say something... anything.
But I don't even know what words mean anymore.
All I can see is blackness.