It was going to take a lot of healing to fully take Nick back and trust him. We both understood that. After my screw up, I felt guilt towards my daughters. And that's exactly why we're here. Sitting in front of Mrs. Woods. Makayla sitting on Nick's lap, and Mercy on mine. Kayla's brown curls, the ones she inherited from her father, bounced as she bounced on Nick's knee.
"Again Mrs. Woods, we are so sorry." He said to her and she didn't look very happy.
"Sweetie, is there anything you want to say?" I said in Mercy's ear. She shook her head, giving me her pouty lip.
"If this happens again-"
"It won't. Right girls?" Nick said, raising an eyebrow and the girls.
"Right." They said in unison. With that, we said goodbye to the principal until Monday and I knew the girls were going to want to go out for ice cream. It's a thing we've done every Friday.
"Ice cream mama?" Makayla asked as Nick buckled her into her seat and I was dealing with a fussy Mercedes.
"Not today sweetheart." Nick kissed Kayla's cheek before shutting her door. I shut the other back door and got in the passenger seat. Nick tried to lean over and kiss me, but I declined it by grabbing his hand instead. I wasn't ready for that.
When we got home, Nick and I sent the girls up to their rooms until we were done talking.
"I can't believe they told their friends we were fighting." I said in disbelief, throwing the car keys in the bowl on the counter.
"And that I was hitting you." Nick said quietly. That was the most shocking. Mercy had made it seem that Nick was beating me, and I was telling him to stop, but he refused. I put my face in my hands and shook my head. My five year old managed to cause this. He touched my shoulder, running his thumb up and down it comfortingly.
"Should we go talk to them? I mean they are only five and six. Mercy didn't know any better. It was all my fault anyway." I looked up at him with tears welling up in my eyes. His gaze locked with mine and he leaned over to kiss my forehead.
"It's not your fault. If anything, it's my fault. Let's just go talk to them, tell them it was wrong, then move on from it."
He always knew exactly what to say at the right time. It amazed me since day one. I nodded and followed Nick upstairs to Kayla's room. Lucky for us, both girls were in her room. Mercy saw Nick, and the waterworks began. Whenever she knew she was in trouble, and Nick was involved, she'd start crying. She was his princess, so she knew she could get away with it. Most of the time.
Kayla just looked at me, ready to take whatever was coming to her.
"Girls, daddy and I want you talk to you about what happened today at school." I started out, hoping he'd keep it going.
"Yes," Nick said, crouching in front of them on the floor.
"First of all, Mercy, it wasn't okay for you to go and tell your friends what was going on between mommy and I. Understand?" Both the girls nodded, silent tears still falling from my daughter's eyes. Nick reached over and wiped them away softly, kissing both girls on the cheek.
"We love you both very much, and are so sorry you had to hear us fighting. It won't happen again." I said, and saw Nick smile a bit. I was relieved as I said it.
The girls said their sorrys to us, then Nick brought me down to his studio to let me hear a new song he's been working on. His voice filled the room soon enough, and I was in heaven. My eyes closed and I leaned back in the chair, taking in the words and trying to figure them out. When the song ended, I opened my eyes to see him looking at soundboard.
"You don't like it?" I asked him, chuckling. For some reason, it didn't feel like we weren't even together. Like we were still those friends who hung out together with his brothers before every show. He glanced over at me with chocolate eyes and bit his bottom lip.
"It's not that. I just feel like something could be added." He pressed some buttons, messed with some dials, then stepped into the booth to sing behind the microphone.
"Ooohh. Oooohh.
Told your mama and your brother you won't compromise.
Say my innocent decision keeps you up at night.
Talking 'bout another man you've been talking to, just to see if I'll get mad and I'll fight for you.
But that's not me.
Right now my head isn't screwed on right, and I can't decide what I want.
Every sweat just breaks me a little, and I know you can take this back and forth. It's not really safe for you in the middle. When you close that door you'll see, it's unhinged, it's just like me.
Oooohh. Oooohh.
You're not the first to try and diagnose what's wrong with me.
I'll be the first to admit that I'm hard to please.
I'm afraid of finding out that I might be right for, cause it's one step closer to life with you, and that's not me yeah.
Right now my head isn't screwed on right, and I can't decide what I want.
Every sweat just breaks me a little, and I know you can take this back and forth. It's not really safe for you in the middle. When you close that door you'll see, it's unhinged, it's just like me.
I ain't scared of my emotion, but I'm afraid to let you see, cause I know if I stay open, then I won't be what you need.
When you close that door you'll see, it's unhinged, it's just like me. If you close that door you'll see, you're unhinged you're just like me.
Oooohh, ooohh. Oooohh, ooohh."
I was blown away completely. The headphones came off his head after a few moments of silence and I began clapping slowly.
"That song is amazing. Oh my goodness." I stood up and threw my arms around his neck in a hug, putting my face in his shoulder.
"Thank you. Now, let's just hope the fans love it as much as you do." He said, letting his grasp off me. I let go of him, putting my hands in the pockets of my jeans.
-
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As he was talking to me about the release of a new song of his, I wasn't fully paying attention. I was second guessing my decision to give him another chance.
"...so I'm really excited for it. Working with Tove was amazing." Hearing him talk about working with another woman made me sick to my stomach. I had yet to find out what he said to Demi the other night after I walked out.
"Yeah, awesome. Hey, I have a question about the other night." I pressed my lips together and anger began to rise in me. One half of me was telling me that I'm crazy for letting him back in. Just for him to hurt me again.
"Yeah?"
"Did you invite Demi over?"
My voice cracked right away, and I knew that I was near breaking down. I wasn't sure if I even wanted to hear his answer.
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