"...unrequited love does not die; it's only beaten down to a secret place where it hides, curled and wounded. For some unfortunates, it turns bitter and mean, and those who come after pay the price for the hurt done by the one who came before."
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January
I know I over-reacted, but at that moment, it felt right. It felt so good when I took that bat down to that car. I swear it released some kind of dopamine in my body, and I just couldn't stop, but I knew I was wrong. I just felt like I was inflicting some damage onto her just like she did me.
I can't believe she punched me.
I rub the side of my face letting my fingers fall to the dried up blood from my busted lip resisting the urge to pick at it. I let a single tear drop from my eye gripping onto the steering wheel tightly. I just never would have thought she would do something like that and all I want is to know why she would raise her hand to me knowing what I had to deal with my entire childhood.
It baffled me and a part of me just wanted to talk to her, but I knew I have done too much to show my face so soon. I can't believe I've lost my best friend. All I am is sadness, every other emotion that burnt and yearned to come into the party called my soul was met by my security guards. Needless to say, their names were never on the list. Love tried to come in every day, the light did too, and happiness swung by once a week.
Where do you go when you want to run to a person you're trying to run from? What the fuck has been on my mind lately? And how the hell did we end up here? I can't keep running away like this. I swear this is some déjà vu.
I pulled up to Naomi's crib because above all the bullshit I still had to confront her about what Sam said. I killed my engine and snatched the keys out of the ignition. I could feel my blood boiling over and them turning over to cook again.
All I could think about was the fact that she really thought she was going to play me. I was pushing away the only person that cares about me for somebody that's out here doing her own thing on me? How? And like where the absolute fuck they do that at? How are you going to cheat on your husband and ME, too?
I raise my hand bashing on her door like I was the police, screaming her name like I had lost my mind because truth be told, I really had. She swung open the door confused, glaring me down and questioning my sanity.
She looked at me like I was the mad woman I had indeed become in the last 24 hours. I pushed passed her "what the fuck is your problem, January?" I held my hand out focusing all my rushing thoughts onto the vital one that heated my soul inside out. I pointed my finger at her rolling in laughter "So, let me get this straight" I say clenching my fist tightly.
I had urges to choke this bitch out and I ain't gone be as lenient as I would have been if she was Samantha. I fucking love Samantha because that girl loves me... unconditionally knowing that I don't deserve it but this bitch had another thing coming.
"You... Are you cheating on me? I mean, I don't know if I can even call it cheating because you are married but maybe you thought you could go out and do your thing but this- between you and me... This is EXCLUSIVE!" she backed in the corner as I grew closer to her.
