Never Again

Chapter 8: Eyes

She had been on the phone with Abby for an hour and her cheeks hurt from laughing. She had realised how much she missed her best friends, especially when the only people she talked to now a days were her parents. She loved them and they were good company, but she couldn't discuss with them a lot of things she wanted to discuss. For example those gorgeous blue eyes she had seen during her trip to the grocery store the other day. Damn it, she had done it again, she had promised herself that she would forget about that stranger. But it was a welcome distraction from thinking about David, although she didn't think it was right to daydream about another guy's eyes. Absentmindedly she stroked the bruise on her head, the swelling had come down and it was slowly starting to heal. It would take a lot of time for the colour to return to normal, but the pain was lessening nevertheless. Suddenly her phone which she had put down on the table started to vibrate, so she picked it up to see what it was.

David - Hey babe, when are you coming home?

She felt an uncomfortable knot tightening in her stomach, David had been sending a lot of these messages lately. She caught herself on feeling guilty towards David, because she never liked people being upset, especially when she was the one causing the trouble. She put the phone back down and decided to reply later. It was for her to get away from it all that she had decided to come to Switzerland in the first place, so he would have to wait for now. She felt her head fogging up and suddenly felt desperate to get out of the house. Without much consideration she put on her shoes and went downstairs. She told her parents that she was going out and she would be back in time for dinner.

'Oh, you're finally starting to make friends here?' her mother said gleefully.

'Something like that,' she smiled, not wanting to hurt her mother's feelings. She didn't have the heart to tell her that in fact, she hadn't even tried to make friends. She felt like an invisible wall was holding her back, every time someone had looked in her direction she quickly had turned her head. She had to admit that she had became afraid of people and did everything to avoid having a conversation with strangers. She just liked to be by herself, especially when she felt like the world was one big evil place.

'OK, have fun darling! Maybe you can invite them over sometime? I would like to meet them.'

'Mum,' Keira said in a desperate voice, 'I'm not 12 anymore!'

'I know sweetie, I'm just interested in your life. You have been living abroad for so long now that I don't know how your life is going anymore,' her mother's face fell a little when she said the last part.

Keira instantly felt guilty, it was true that she didn't share that much about her life with her parents. She also knew that maybe she hadn't visited home as much as she should have done the past years. Life had been busy and she had been enjoying her time in London, she often hadn't even thought about home. Maybe she had been a bit selfish, only thinking about herself, while her parents had been back home waiting for signals of life from her. She knew her mother got lonely sometimes now both her sister and herself had moved out. When she thought about it this could also be the reason they got Molly, to bring back some life into the house. She promised herself that from now on she would keep in contact more, because her family naturally was really important to her.

'I know mum, I'm sorry. Maybe one day I'll invite them over for dinner, alright?'

'That'll be nice darling, now go and have fun!' she kissed Keira and pushed her towards the door.

'Ok, bye, tell dad I said goodbye to him too!' she yelled while almost tripping on the doorstep.

It was not hard to figure out where to go, she had been going to the same place ever since she had discovered it. She had been walking, absorbed in her own thoughts and had just followed where her feet were taking her. Bonus points for Switzerland were easily given, because almost everywhere you went it was breathtakingly beautiful. She loved it here even more during wintertime, when the hills were covered in a thick layer of snow and the sunlight was reflected on the white surfaces. The snow would bring a deafening silence and then the world just seemed to stop. It made a wonderful place to think about your life and the snow would feel like a protective blanket. She loved the sound of silence, it was the most blissful sound on earth. Sadly it was also the sound hardest to find, because the world never stopped moving and people almost forgot to stand still and breath.