the war against myself

do i dare tell?

Fear gushes inside my veins,

Black instead of red poison flowing into the lane

it used to keep a heartbeat alive and well,

How long until they realize...?

Do i dare tell?

The clouds no longer speak to me,

Only pouring rain to my feet

No idea of what comfort is

As my thoughts began to drain,

Sickening words carving themselves into my lungs,

Breathing in and out all the venom

Their arrows are kept sharp,

Kindness became no such thing

As their mouths shot fiery bullets

Straight into my dead heartbeat

Am I alive or just breathing?

I no longer comprehend

The meaning to be alive

Without feeling intensely tired

Or rolling back my eyes.

There was no dream to sleep to,

Nothing to look up to

And everything that once meant so much,

Now was only worthless junk ---

Do I dare tell?