**ORIGINALLY FROM GAM!! There may be sex and swearing so be warned in case**
Chapter One
Regrets, I hate them; it’s one thing to do something nasty then get on with your life but to do something then regret it, worst mistake ever. I can’t believe I said those words. What came out of my mouth that night was totally uncalled for and unnecessary. Of course I regret it and my mistake has been flaunted in my face every day for the past 3 months!
I still remember how she smelt, how she looked at me with her big brown eyes when she was trying to convince me to do something and how she moaned sensually as we made love.
All those thing are in the past and it’s like they’re coming back to haunt me.
...
Cheryl had divorced Ashley when we got together, she was happy to do so and I was happy she did it. Of course I’d left my boyfriend Justin too, it was the right thing to do plus the love had gone and there was no spark left. He’d been sad but I had explained the situation and he understood. He’d said deep down that he always knew I’d had a thing for Cheryl it was only a matter of time before we both realised.
It was nice of him really, I hadn’t expected him to be so nice about it to be honest, I was expecting a row or maybe someone storming out, but no. He’d shed a few tears of course and said he wished things could have turned out different but he knew what I wanted, who I wanted.
The relationship was blossoming with Cheryl. We’d known each other for 6 years and there had always been an undercurrent of sexual tension there but both of us blew it off and just acted like best friends and sometimes like a mother figure in my case.
As Girls Aloud we were at the height of our success and as we were about to go on tour we confessed to the others that Cheryl and I were in fact in a relationship. By that point we’d only been together for a month but as we’d be around the girls for a few months’ constantly we felt the need to tell them our situation. They were quite supportive actually, surprisingly so. I think they felt that as long as we were happy then they would support it. However at the beginning it had been a little strange; sometimes they weren’t sure what to say around us, in case they offended us with a joke and sometimes they’d catch us kissing and that would be a little embarrassing. We had tried our best to be discreet, we didn’t want to make any of them more uncomfortable then necessary and we mostly succeeded.
After the tour the papers had found out about the relationship. We still to this day don’t know who leaked the information or how they’d found out, all we know is that is wasn’t any of close friends, we assume it may have been a member of the tour staff and that maybe they’d over heard something. At the beginning it was very difficult to shield ourselves from the media. Cameras followed us everywhere desperately trying to get a shot of us being a couple so we avoided any form of bodily contact whilst outside the safety of our homes. Both being very tactile people we found it very difficult but somehow we managed, the press realised after about a month that we weren’t going to give them any pictures and they started to leave us alone, thankfully.
And that leads me onto the present. Why I regretted things I did. Life would be so much better now if we wouldn’t have had that dreaded argument.
TBC...
