Nothing Gold Can Stay

Chapter 4

Its been five weeks.

Five very long and painful weeks since everything happened, since all of them died and Ive been left alone.

Alone, alone, alone, alone, alone, alone, alone, that word keeps repeating in my head spinning over and over bringing uneasiness with it. Its been five weeks since the accident and four since the funeral.

We had invited my uncle, the only relative my parents had, he was my moms brother, I didn't really know him that well, he never really came to visit us only on rare occasions and that was usually to ask for money loans from my dad.

He was a drunk, he drank a little too much for my moms liking and although he was her brother and she loved him with all her heart, she though he was a bad influence to us that she did not want us to see.

If she knew that'd id be living with him from now on shed probably freak, what she doesn't know cant kill her, I went sour at the thing Id just thought.

You'd think id be happy having Alex by my side, but the truth was he was almost never here for me, besides promising what he did he did almost nothing for me.

After he got me out of the hospital and bought me home he stayed with me a few hours collecting food dishes and pity gifts from all the neighbors and people who knew about my families dead.

After most of them had came he left saying he had to go somewhere really important and that he'd be back soon, he'd promised.

But I guess that didn't mean anything since he never came back that day, if it weren't for the group I would've been all alone, although I'd sent them home saying I wanted to be alone, they understood saying their quick goodbyes and leaving.

He didn't come until two days later saying he couldn't come since he'd been grounded by his dad, I didn't really listen all I saw was the 'twich, twitch', his jaw made as he said it. Lies, lies, lies, lies, and more lies that's al he said to me Lies.

At the funeral we'd all been there me, Alex, the group, our neighbors, some friends and the priest. To tell you the truth I zone out the whole speech, I couldn't hear, it was as if I was underwater and my ears were sealed shut. All I could do was see everything happen in slow motion, and as the priest nodded at me to go up to saw a few words I slowly went up, feeling as if my feet were carrying big bags of cement. I continued though as I made my way up to the little stage they had made, as I walked I saw all the people staring at me with pitying looks and sad faces, all dressed in black as myself. When I reached the top I let out a deep breath and looked up at everyone, I have no remembering of what I said, only that it pleased everyone as I saw some smiles appear here and there. After that I went home, I didn't feel like staying to watch my family be buried forever.

And now here we are three weeks later, three weeks without eating well, without sleeping, not being able to cry, I know it isn't okay, I know my mom wouldn't want me like this, she always used to say,' if a soul leaves this world a new one comes in, and its for the best', whatever that means. So I decided it was time for me to grow up and accept the truth about what happened, I had to be that strong soldier my mom always wanted me to be.

"Angie?" Alex's head popped through my door disturbing my thoughts.

"Yeah" I said lowly he could barely hear, as I looked up at him I saw his face filled with something like nervousness and worry.

"Um, I-I have to um, go somewhere, fast, um right now." he said

"Where, can I go with you?"

"No! I mean um ill just go by myself I need to go to my dads, and you know..." twitch, twitch.

"Okay" I said as calmly as possible as he quickly closed the door and slammed through the front one. I quickly jumped out of bed as I changed putting on some black jeans and shirt with a black hoodie and shoes. I looked in the mirror, other than my puffy dull eyes, I actually looked fine, so as fast as I could, I ran down the steps and into the street, putting my hood up in the process. I didn't want anyone to see me and although it was to early to wearing a hoodie in  summer I didn't care.

What are you doing you might ask, well I'm sick of Alex lying to m e non-stop, so I'm going to this 'place' he keeps going off too. Even if its like ten in the night and its pitch black. As I walked I could barely make out Alex's shape as I followed him behind, sometimes hiding when he turned around so he wouldn't see me. We walked for quite a while as he headed towards the unknown part of town, well unknown to me. To be honest Alex's stupid for all I know he could be followed for miles and he wouldn't notice. Suddenly he turned the corner and headed under a bridge where a bunch of people where hanging.

I hid on the side of the bridge I slowly peeked over to find Alex. All the people were talking or drinking or laughing, but I felt like there was something off about them, something different.

What I saw next broke my heart.

It was Alex, he was lip locked with someone, but that wasn't what hurt the most.

As a squeak left my mouth everybody turned to stare at me.

Alex broke off the kiss with the person he was kissing and looked me right in the eyes.

As he moved I saw who it was.

It wasn't a girl.

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~Ellie