Relaunch

Amanda

It was a quiet night. I didn't get to sleep late, just after some dinner at home, some homework. It's 7:30 am and radio wakes me. Good morning, radio.

I wake up, shave, prepare a light breakfast with orange juice and some butter toasts and get my sports clothes to go out running.

My day started like this for many years. With the years I just found out what makes me feel good. For sure, solitude! But also listen some old music, read the classics, cook for myself.

All my relationships ended. Some were kind of sad. Some others we just felt the love was gone or wasted, and no need to argue or complain. I was not made for family life. I see all these portraits in advertisements and it's definitively not made for me. I can imagine the pressure of paying a loan, the car insurance or loosing a job. If you are by your side, it's ok if you hang out any night to dinner anything. Not if you have a family. Then you belong to something else. You belong to all other people you made the family. Provably that's not so bad when you build it brick by brick, but seeing the entire thing all made and done just freaks me out.

I was thinking what my life would have been if I made other decisions. Maybe getting a fixed job instead of being a freelancer, or maybe working hard to be a musician and not only playing when I have the mood for it. At some point I think my life has been always on the average. Nothing really much special. Not many risks, even I could have handled some.

After running, I had a short shower and went to Marcia's. New face at the bar. A nice looking woman, around thirty five years old. Brown hair, nice smile.

- Good morning. My name is Amanda, it's my first day at Marcia's. What may I offer you?

- Good morning Amanda. My name is Alan Smith and I come every day. Nice to meet you. I always order the same things. Coffee, cherry pie.

- I must warn you that I did the cherry pie today, so maybe it's kind of different as how Marcia does it.

- That will be just fine.

I didn't felt much talkative, but Amanda seemed quite interested in knowing all customers in there... or, at least, she seemed much interested in knowing me.

- I saw you running before.

- Yes... old habit.

- I also run. Maybe you saw me running in the park on the weekend.

- No, sorry. I never saw you before.

- I use to run in the park also, during the weekends.

- I never pay much attention to other runners – I lied. – It's a time I take only for myself and helps me to clear my mind, think about myself, you know.

- Maybe I could join you running this Saturday?

- No, thanks, Amanda... you are so kind, but I don't think you need to go that far with your customers.

- Come on, Alan. It's just me, the new waitress, trying to meet all fixed people here in the bar, don't be so hard.

- You are doing it right, Amanda. May I enjoy my coffee and my cherry pie? Thanks!

She agreed, with a smile in her face. She acted as my attitude affects her in no way. She took some empty cups in the bar and told me silently.

- I know about your daughter, Alan. We need to talk.