Haven [Marvel | Bucky Barnes]

Chapter 25

James chuckled at her as the door clicked shut, his eyes twinkling at the surprised look she imagined was on her face at Captain America's word choice. Iris snorted in disbelief, an amused grin breaking through even as James' hand found its way back into her hair. But her grin faded as his steel-blue eyes grew serious. His fingers tangled themselves in her curls as his jaw alternatively tensed and relaxed. Her hand lifted to his face again, her thumb tracing over the clenched muscles of his jaw until they eased. He inhaled deeply before the words began spilling from his lips, his voice hoarse and anxious.

"You—you knew who I was, what I was—what I am and yet you—with me—" he faltered, still looking up at her with anxious disbelief.

"Yet I still wanted you," Iris finished for him, "still invited you into my bed? Still wanted you to touch me?" Her voice was soft and questioning as she finished his thought. He nodded stiffly, his gaze nearly dropping from hers. Iris sighed, her fingers carding through his hair as she watched the distressing play of emotions across his face; shame, self-reproach, guilt.

"Why?" He was pleading for an answer, to understand. She supposed it made sense that he still couldn't quite understand why she didn't think he'd used her, or taken advantage of her. She had at first, but those feelings were long gone, banished by the realization of why he'd done what he did. He couldn't wrap his head around the idea that she could possibly want him, could care for him, knowing the truth about him and his past as she did. He didn't believe he could deserve her, deserve this. She leaned in, resting her forehead against his.

"Why?" she repeated, her other hand rising to cup his jaw as well, tilting his face so she could meet his beautiful, conflicted gaze, "I love you." It was the simplest answer in the world, and Iris simply said it. His fingers tightened in her hair.

And he pressed his lips to hers.

Iris sighed, melting against him as he kissed her, his mouth warm and hesitant against hers, as though asking if this were alright. Her arms wound around him, pressing herself closer, deepening the kiss as her heart thundered happily in her chest, tracing his lips with her tongue until they parted for her, kissing her back almost desperately. It was more than alright.

He drew back with an erratic inhale, his fingertips loosening from her dark curls to trace along the sensitive skin of her neck before dropping to slip beneath her jacket and tighten around her waist. Another sigh escaped Iris as his face dipped to spot his fingers had ghosted over before nuzzling against the juncture of her neck. The sensation of his breath on her skin followed by the warm brush of his lips sent shivers through her.

"You're so soft," he murmured against her shoulder, "and too good for me." He raised his head, resting his forehead against hers again, his eyes simultaneously warm and reserved. "You kept me sane, Iris. You helped me keep my head. You were...you were my safe place. After I left you—" he faltered again, his eyes closing in pain. Her hand rubbed soothing circles against his back as she studied his face, taking in every flicker of gratitude and guilt and uncertainty. She smiled sadly, brushing her lips over his.

"You didn't have to, you know. I would have done anything. I could have come with you." His eyes opened to meet hers solemnly as he slowly shook his head.

"No. No, you couldn't have. I couldn't put you in that kind of danger." She sighed sadly.

"You would have kept me safe," she insisted with soft certainty. The grin that tugged at his mouth said that, while grateful for her trust, he didn't have the same faith she did.

"You were safe in DC. Safe away from me." A disagreeing sound caught in her throat, causing his brow to furrow with a silent plea for explanation. Her lip catching between her teeth, Iris hesitated, her fingers tracing her necklace where it hung at the base of his throat.