The Messages

Chapter 4

When I woke up, Bin and I were facing each other and our faces were inches apart. His face is so beautiful. He has perfect features, perfect eyes, lips and is super kind. He is perfect in every sense of the word. Bin cuddles closer to me in his sleep and I just hold him. I pet his head and he purrs in his sleep. I sigh and rest my head on the pillow and hold him as I pet his head. He cuddles closer yet. I hold onto him tighter. I will never let him go. I will make him mine.

I hold him for 4 hours before he finally wakes up.

"Hello, Nae Ai. Did you sleep well?" I ask kindly.

"Ne, what about you?" Bin asks stretching into my side.

"I slept well. Are you hungry, Jagi?"

"Ye. I want beef."

"Arriso."

"But I don't want you to leave me alone. I want you to stay with me."

"Okay. I will have Minhyuk bring it."

"Gomawo," he says and hugs me.

"Anyo."

I grab my phone and text Minhyuk and ask him to bring him food for Bin. I put my phone away and look at Bin to find that he is asleep. I smile and hold him. I think of how I remember us doing this as young children. I would go over to his house to spend the night and I would sleep in his bed and he would cuddle me because he was scared of the dark. I smile at the memory. I used to love going to his house and eat his Appa's cooking. We would all watch movies together and eat buttered popcorn. I loved those days. Then his dad found out that Bin's mother was cheating on him with her boss and killed himself. It destroyed Bin. He was super depressed and he didn't want to live anymore. I basically lived at his house for an entire year. I was always by his side helping him. He had lost everything that night and to make it all worse, he was the one who found his dad's body. He blamed it all on himself. He never let it go.

"Appa. Appa. Appa!" Bin said in his sleep

"Bin. Bin. Wake up Jagi," I say shaking him awake lightly.

His eyes snap open and he starts crying. I pull him close to me and just hold him. He cuddled closer and cried on my shoulder.

"Shhh. It's okay. I'm here."

"I know, but Dad isn't."

"When you get out in a few days, do you want to go visit him?"

"Please?"

"Of course."

He smiles at me and I smile back.

"Can I borrow your laptop so I can check my email?"

"Yeah. Let me log out of mine."
I grab my laptop and log in and open my Gmail account and log out. I give the computer to him and he logs in.

"I'm going to go get us some food while you do that. Araso?"

He nods and I get up and go to the bathroom and change, seeing as I haven't changed in a few days. When I am done, I go to the restaurant next door and order food for the two of us. When I get back, I see that he is concentrating on typing and doesn't notice that I came in. I set up his food and waited for him to finish what he was doing. 

My phone rings and I see a text from Sanha. 

"Appa. Guess what! I passed my test! Are you proud of me? Please tell me you are proud of me. Tell Eomma to get better soon so we can play video games again."

I smile at the text. 

"Bin."

"Hmm?"

"Sanha passed the test he was worried about."

"That is good, but who is Sanha?"

"Oh. I forgot. Well, Sanha is like our child. You are his Eomma and I am his Appa. He is our child. Not our actual child but he is like our child."

I pull up a picture of Sanha and Bin and handed him my phone.

"You two had taken my phone when I had gone to take a shower at one of the hotels we were staying at when we had gone to America. I had gotten mad but quickly gotten over it because you looked so cute sitting there with him. You looked like a caring parent and I couldn't stay mad knowing that Sanha looked up to us so much. I could only think of how cute you looked in that instant. So small, fragile, beautiful. I wanted to have you by my side, but I was scared that you were going to leave if I told you. Sanha is fragile, sensitive, and our child."

"Oh. Can he come and visit?"

"I'll have him come over when school is over. Is that okay?

"Yeah. Can I ask you something?"

"Always."

"When you said that I looked beautiful and cute and fragile, what did you mean?"

"Umm, because I... Umm..."

"Just tell me. Please?"

I sigh. "N-n-n-nan Ne-ne-neoreul s-s-saranghae."