My mind is telling me to stop, it's too soon. But my body apparently has a mind of its own as I lean in and up so we are at in even height and now sitting. After what feels like an hour, but only less than a minute in reality, he licks my bottom lip asking for entry, which I don't allow because my mind actually won't let me.
A few seconds later he grabs my hips and lifts me, causing me to open my eyes and pull away. He pulls me onto his lap so I'm now straddling him. His sudden movement was actually a tactic I only realised when I gasped. A gasp in which he took as permission to take our innocent kiss to the next level.
It was only a minute or so into our make out session when I gained the strength to pull away. We stared at each other, breathless, as I my hands that were once tangled in his blond hair moved onto his shoulders to keep myself from going in for more. His hands remained on my hips as I continued to straddle him.
"Well then..." I say, still flabbergasted. Ah fuck I love that word. Flabbergasted.
"That was..." he said, our eyes stayed firmly on each other's, not daring to look anywhere else. I think we were both surprised, I could tell he was and I knew I was. We both wanted it, but to our dismay, we know we should stop. Or at least I do...
Because it's too soon? Because it will makes things awkward? I don't know... I don't know why I feel guilty or weird.
"Yes, I agree, lets go to bed shall we?" I say, attempting to change the subject I so desperately did not want to change. He nods slowly, a tad speechless I suppose. I don't know why, I mean that was one good kiss, for me anyway? And we'd waited so long before doing anything.. but he's been with so many girls, so many models I might add. Why on earth is he looking at me like that?
I hop off his lap and lay beside him so we are facing each other, "um... goodnight?"
"Uh yeah, goodnight," he says uncertainly and his hand slowly moves towards my face and beyond to turn the light off behind me. I stopped breathing as he approached me, thinking he was going to do that romantic hung where the guy tucks the girls hair behind her ear idk. WE JUST WATCHED THE NOTEBOOK GIMME A BREAK.
His hand returns to where it once was, placed next to the other in front of his chest, like mine. If we looked the same, it'd seem far to symmetrical the way we are lying. After the light turned off I could see anything at first, until my eyes adjusted around a minute or so later and I could see Justin still had his eyes open. Except he wasn't looking at me. I mean he was... but not at my eyes. His eyes were fixated on my hands. As they twitched, his nose scrunched up ever so slightly, most likely subconsciously, but regardless it still made me smile.
I moved my hand slowly down to near my stomach, sure enough his eyes followed. My eye contact with his was only broken when his hand moved closer to mine until he gently grab a hold of one and intertwined them. I looked back up to his eyes to find them shut tight now.
Fucking pussy.
I feel asleep not long after. I slept dreamless from what I can remember and I woke up Justinless too. Great.
I turn over to get my phone as I rubbed my eyes to find that it was 5 am. Less than 4 hours sleep. Ever greater.
As I sit my phone down, a figure laying in Justin's bed, facing away from me with a distinctive tattoo of a pair of wings on their neck catches my attention. He went back to his own bed. Greatest.
Why did he leave???? It's not like he didn't have enough room... we both have queens for Christ sake. And I don't move in my sleep from what I've been told. Not kidding, my parents have called the ambulance more than once thinking I died in my sleep. Maybe he thought I was dead and didn't wanna get blamed so he moved beds???
Omg what did I do? Am I a bad kisser?? But he held my hand after? Was that out of pity? Like poor you u suck at kissing u stupid bitch, lemme hold you hand. Omg KILL ME IM A BAD KISSER!
He made a small movement and I thumped myself back into my bed, hitting my head on the back board.
"MOTHER FUCKER COCK SUCKING SHIT BALLS BITCH TITS" I groan charmingly as I grasp my the back of my head with both of my hands. I heard a thump from next to me after I hit my head, but the pain over threw the motivation to investigate what it was. Besides, I didn't need to after Justin approached me by taking my face in his hands and turning me to him. I fucking made him fall of his bed.
"Are you okay?!" He says with a concerned expression on his face and bed hair that looks fucked but sexy at the same time. His hands replaced mine at the back of my head as he massaged the spot that was killing me.
I winced at the pain a little but hardly because his touch was helping. It was a good type of pain I suppose. Like when you get a knot in your back and you rub it. I found myself staring at him. Mesmerised you could say. His concern expression held for a while until he returned my stare, then he went wide eyed.
"Better?" He said. He almost seemed uncomfortable, which made me want to cry a little because it was only further confirmation that last night was a pile of shit and nothing to him. All I could do was nod, "good," he said and his hands then slowly withdrew from my hair. He then quickly scurried back to his bed, facing away from me as he did before.
"Go back to sleep, Grace, we can get a couple more hours before we have to leave," is all he said before the silence. It was like he didn't even know me. And he called me Grace too. Not g-banger, or gray, or G, or any other nickname his used to refer to me other than my real one.
Idgi I swear I'm not a shit kisser..
•••
HERE WE GO LOVELIES!!
Another chapter I promised a while ago to which I did not deliver on time, classic Grace...
I do hope this one is satisfying for you guys though :)))
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