These Scars

Chapter 8

The next few years of Leo's and N's life were definitely a challenge. There were good times, bad times and all the times in between, but Leo was there with N for all of it.

Eventually the word got out about N's depression and his suicide attempt. His fans were supportive. The anti-fans not so much. To say the least this was not a good time for N, but VIXX was there for him, his fans were there for him, his therapist, which they had changed to a much more understanding and well trained person, was there for him, and, of course, Leo was there for him. He got through it.

After having continuous meeting with his new therapist she decided the best thing for N would be to start trying to find a medication that would help him, so the pills began. There were all kinds of concoctions. Small pills, big pills, tablets, capsules, red ones, yellow ones. There were pills for depression, pills for anxiety, pills for insomnia, and others. All mixed in different ways to see which combination would work best.

Every new mixture seemed to have different effects. He stared with a single pill. This pill made him so tired that sometimes he would sleep all day, unable to get anything done. Then they gave him another pill to try and fix that problem, but the sleep problem was then replaced with insomnia, so another pill was added, and so on for each off effect. Then it seemed to all work for a while, but as all good things seemed to do, it ended. So, they scrapped all those pills and started work on a new collection. This process seemed unending, new problems always surfacing. Nothing ever quite worked right. Sometimes N just wanted to stop. He wanted to curl up into a cocoon and stay there, but Leo was always there for him.

Now looking down at N and recalling all that had happened Leo was happy he had stayed. N was sleeping peacefully in their bed, hair a mess and shirt pulled up slightly, his tan, toned stomach showing. Leo set the tray he was holding on the bedside table, being careful not to spill its contents. He had woken up early and made pancakes that were now soaked in syrup and sitting on the plate next to the cup of coffee and the little white pills.

Leo sat on the side of the bed shaking N's leg slightly.

"Wake up sleepy head." Leo said quietly.

N slowly opened his eyes, holding his arms open wanting to snuggle and not get out of bed. Leo obliged laying down in N's grasp and letting N's arms wrap around him.

"I made you breakfast." Leo said into N's shoulder.

"Really? What's the occasion?" N asked. Leo could hear the smile in his voice and feel the love in his heart as N kissed the top of his head.

"No occasion." Leo says, "I just wanted too."

"Well then, I should eat it before it gets cold right?" N stated sitting up and pulling Leo up with him. Leo stood up and got the tray off the table, setting it down in front of N and sitting opposite him.

N cut a piece of the pancake and stuck it in his mouth. He smiled and hummed in satisfaction. He cut another piece and stuck it up to Leo's mouth. Leo took it and smiled back at N.

They continued that way until the pancakes were all gone. Now that N had eaten Leo picked up the pills and handed them over. N tossed them back and chased them down with the coffee.

"How are these working for you?" Leo asked, a hint of concern in his voice.

"They are the best I've had so far. Let's hope they stay that way."

N could sense that Leo's mood was going down with the conversation so he promptly leaned forward wrapping his arms around Leo's neck, looking into his round dark eyes.

"I love you." N said close to Leo's face.

Leo leaned in pressing his mouth to N's. He can taste the sweetness of the syrup mixed with the bitter coffee. The kiss didn't last long before they pulled away.

"I love you too." Leo said.

N giggled and got out of bed, getting ready for the day. Leo would go to the studio later to work on more songs for their LR promotions, but N had the normal busy schedule that constantly kept him away.

As he watched N prance around the room grabbing various objects to take with him to the bathroom, Leo couldn't help but feel joy bubble in his chest. The love of his life, his lifelong friend, finally seemed happy again, and the world was looking brighter.