Savage - Phanfic

Chapter Fourteen

** TRIGGER WARNING: Read with caution, for your own safety. Remember this is just a story and you are safe (: still read with this in mind. I don't want anyone triggered by the heavy content! Thank you.

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Dans Pov

I woke up early in the summer morning. There was only a few days until summer were to end and I would be sent to the university.

The first time in a long time, I actually got up from the bed to fix my hair and wear something rather than a black shirt. What better than a plaid shirt and trousers! I straightened my hair and put on my shoes.
And yet again, the first time in forever, I was to head home to my parents to tell them my news.

I went inside my car and took a big breath. Am I actually doing this? Did I finally get a job?

I started to drive, like a haven't took my parent's route in a long time. I watched a little boy and his parents walk on the streets. I grinned, remembering when I used to do that.
As I drove a corner, I see a small, decent house. It was subtle and calm, and reminded me of my childhood.

"Hello?" I hear the sweet and longing voice of my mom.
Afraid to talk or even face her, I stumble upon finding what  words to say to her. The last time I had seen her was when she yelled at me for flunking my core classes. But that was two years ago. I didn't even visit her for Christmas. It was coming soon as well.

We had a long fight and I screamed at her. I remember it word for word, but I intentionally put it off and never think about it.

"I hate you! That's right, HATE. All you do is tell me that Im no good. I dont do anything right! I cant even walk without your goddamn mouth telling me I am wrong, according to you! I can't even touch anything in my room without you telling me how messy my room is, according to you! And when I walk outside all you do is scream at me because I barely go outside, according to you. Worst of all, you tell me how other kids act, how YOU want your child to act! Guess what? I guess I am not perfect, ACCORDING TO YOU. I am not the perfect child you wanted, ACCORDING TO YOU. I am not your child, and you are not my mother!" I finally scream, with one last word. One last word to initiate our distance from each other. The mother who I once knew lost her child.

I didn't know if she still wanted to be my son. After all I said, I knew the two of us knew the words I said to her word for word.

I put it all behind me and clear my throat. This was supposed to be the news she wanted to hear from her new son. The son she wanted.

With this in mind, I held my chin high, and got myself ready for anything. I made a dorky ninja stance, and then shook it off. I closed my eyes and knocked on the door, not rough at all.

I hear footsteps. I wonder if my mum was home. I stood frozen, waiting for a response.

After a few seconds, I hear a soft voice in reply. It has no tone to it, but it was soft.

"Who is it?"

It was definitely my mum. I opened my mouth, trying to say my name, but I just couldn't do it. I opened my mouth again, finally forcing my name to come out.

"Its- um" I pause, and try saying my name in no tone at all. "Dan.. Howell."

I bit my lip so hard, it bled through. Then, I jumped up as I heard the door knob open. I quickly brushed the blood off my lips. I kept telling myself that I can actually face her this time and be normal and not rage at her.

"What-" My mum says, about to speak. Suddenly I see a man come around the corner into the living room, where we were.

Mum, annoyingly whispers into dad's ear. "Its Dan.."
Dad looks up at me, the both of them don't grin. Neither do I.

I gripped my palm. I can do this.

"What did you want to tell u-"

Swiftly, I ran to the door. Not thinking I ran, and ran. I ran as far as my non-athletic legs can take me. I closed my eyes and blinked the tears away, flying carelessly across my face. I didn't care anymore.

This is it. I can't do this. I can't face my parents. I can't do anything productive. I can't make friends. I can't get good grades. I can't socialize properly. I can't get a job or education. I can't do anything unique or anything that sets me apart from everyone.

Nonetheless I was worthless.

I stopped running when I hit a wall. I opened my eyes when I realized a stumbled opened a bridge. I collapsed to my knees.

I smelled the cool breeze as I closed my eyes. I breathed in and out for one last time. I tilted over and put my arms out, preparing for the landing.

I dived in.

I smell a sweet scent. Odd. I still closed my eyes accepting my death. Was this how death felt like?

"Am I dying?" I mumble to myself, still closing my eyes.

"No, you aren't." A firm, but breathy voice said.

I felt a shock come through me. I am alive. I am not dead. But how?

I opened my eyes, in fear that I can see again. Right before me is a boy, also in the same trans as me. Both of us breathing heavily at the bottom of a cliff. The cool mist of the waves hit our faces, enabling us not to see how many sparks of water hit us every time the river comes back in a repeating manner.

Right when I blink, I see the boy, clearly this time. Phil Lester saved me.