Running Out of Time

Chapter 13 - Thank Goodness (It's The Painkillers)

Hamilton paced up and down the hall, he couldn't bring himself to go anywhere else. Peggy was quietly sitting in the waiting room occasionally looking up to watch him pass. She had already told Hamilton about eight times that he didn't need to worry but it had no effect. He continued to pace with no intention of stopping. He couldn't help it, he was worried about Laurens.

At some point the sun had come up, even that had been a few hours ago. The hardest part for Hamilton had been watching Laurens while they waited for other doctors to arrive. Peggy knew Hamilton was being just a little overdramatic about the whole situation but she didn't mind, it was a little it amusing in some strange way.

Peggy wasn't sure if Hamilton understood exactly what appendicitis was but she didn't feel like explaining it to him. She saw Hamilton finally stop pacing as Burr walked in to tell her she could go see Laurens. Hamilton followed her so closely that they could have easily been wearing the same shoes. She could hear him mumbling about hoping for the best. It made her want to laugh a little but she contained herself, she knew it would look a little strange if she just burst into laughter.

"PEGgy," Laurens smiled as she walked in. He wasn't on strong painkillers but he was drowsy from the anesthetic.

"Laurens," she sat in the chair next to his bed with Hamilton behind her, "how are you doing?" She watched as his eyes grew wide, she hadn't thought they could get quite that big but they had.

He blinked a few times before he said anything, "Peggy, don't look now, but I think I just solved a mystery."

"Oh yeah," she could help but smile at the way he was talking, "what did you find?"

"Peggy," Hamilton said quietly, "he's not looking at you."

Upon further inspection she realized that he was right. Laurens wasn't looking at her, he was looking at Hamilton. Neither of them wanted to react. It couldn't be possible for Laurens to see Hamilton, it hadn't been like that before, why would it change now?

"Alexander," Laurens reached out a hand to him.

Hamilton stood there for a moment, he wasn't sure what he was supposed to do in this situation. Of course, he wanted to take his hand and hold him but he couldn't, he would pass right through him. Hamilton gave a soft smile and sat on the edge of the bed, "hey there."

Laurens lit up in a big goofy smile, "you're cute."

"And you're tired," Hamilton pretended to smooth out the blanket, "get some rest."

"No," Laurens shook his head before yawning, "I'm not tired." It appeared that Laurens was aware enough to realize that this could possibly be some hallucination caused by whatever medication he was on. If that was the case, he didn't want to leave that state. Hamilton was here with him when he had never been before, Laurens wanted things to stay just like this for a while but he was having a hard time staying awake. He didn't want to miss this moment.

"Yes, you are. Now, you better go to sleep," Hamilton was joking around a little.

Laurens was already falling asleep, "but I'm not tired."

"Shhh," Hamilton hushed him, "go to sleep."

Hamilton and Peggy sat there in the quiet for a few minutes to make sure that Laurens was asleep. She was convinced that it had something to do with the combination of the anesthetic and the painkillers, she couldn't think of any other option. Hamilton was completely blown away, he had just had a considerably successful conversation with Laurens. He almost couldn't believe it had truly happened.

"Peggy, did you see that? Holy shit," Hamilton was still looking at Laurens,he looked so peaceful.

"Yeah," she nodded.

There was another moment of silence before Hamilton looked at her, "he's not dead." He thought about the words he had just said for a second, "he's not dead, that means..."

"You have a chance."

Even Peggy had been starting to lose some of her hope but now it was back. They had a real chance now. She hadn't let herself worry about Laurens despite the small voice in the back of her head that said something could go wrong, it all went okay. Everything was going to be fine. As far as Peggy was concerned, this had to mean that Hamilton was going to wake up. She couldn't listen to the little voice at this point, he had to wake up now.

Hamilton wasn't as sure as she was. There were still a number of things that could go terribly wrong. There were millions of things that could prevent him from waking up. Absolutely anything could happen, it was almost terrifying. He couldn't help but think that Laurens could be ripped away at any moment without them having any proper time together. Hamilton knew that they would come back again and in that time they could be together, but he didn't want that. He wanted now. Hamilton just wanted to wake up and run down the stairs to sit here with Laurens in reality. He wanted to be something that could feel touch.

Through all these thoughts, one stood out. It was when Laurens had told him stop. He took a moment to breathe. He knew that he could think back to that moment when he would need to. He was grateful to have Laurens to recognize when he thought too much, even when Laurens couldn't see him. Without that, Hamilton would probably have thought himself into a hole. It wasn't nice to think about.

--

Lafayette and Eliza were standing in the kitchen drinking some wine and snacking on things that weren't yet expired. Laurens had to stay in the hospital overnight for observations and Peggy thought it best to stay with him, however, she had made Hamilton go home. He was sitting on the counter listening to the two gossip about some of the people they worked with until the conversation eventually changed.

They had firstly changed to talking about their week. Inevitably, they had gotten around to Hamilton. For him, the past ten days had all melted into one chunk of him being a ghost. It had been a pretty hectic week for both Eliza and Lafayette, they had their own share of things that went on. Hamilton had every little to do with either of their timelines, that was certain to change if he woke up.  

"So, what do you think? Do you think he'll wake up," Eliza asked.

"I'm not sure, he might. Peggy thinks he will," Lafayette explained.

Hamilton wasn't about to express his hopelessness to Lafayette. He knew that Peggy would think that, she was Eliza's sister after all. Hamilton was fairly certain that he was the only one who could tell just how alike they were. Eliza was much more openly positive but he knew that Peggy had that in her too. At first, Hamilton had been the positive attitude between them but now it was Peggy.

"You know, it's a little weird but sometimes I think I hear him. Is that weird?"

Lafayette looked directly at Hamilton before looking back at Eliza, "I don't think it's weird at all."