Lilac

Blue Bruises

The next week was awkward- to say the least.

Dan's brother would barely talk to him, and Dan didn't know what to do when the two were left alone. He didn't know weather to talk about what went on or if it was something they were supposed to pretend didn't happen.

Every time Dad did talk to him, it didn't go to well.

"How was school?"

"Fine."

"How are things with your girlfriend?"

"Better than you and your girlfriend."

After that he didn't try to talk to him again.

Dan hadn't talked to Phil in a week despite being at school with him half the day. The dread, uneasiness and nervousness he had gone through was hair-pullingly stressful.

He sat on his bed holding his face with his hands and looked at the carpet of his room.

I want to see Phil.

Your brother hates you and all you can think about is your friend? He barely even likes you.

Hey, maybe you could not shame me for wanting to see my friend.

Hey maybe you should stop being such a fuck up.

Conversations like that looped around Dan's head all day, everyday. A never ending battle that could not be won.

He lifted his arms up to rub his eyes in frustration.

He was feeling a lot of that lately- frustration.

Dan's arm became sore from all the snapping of his rubber band. He stared helplessly at his right wrist and found calmness in the brusies. The black and blue was a new and calming sight to him- and he saw beauty. The intricate pattern of how the bruise looked reminded him of Summer Blues blooming. He loved looking at the way his veins popped out at his eyes. He liked seeing the beautiful calming blue  portrait his body had painted for him. It was all so delicate. Like fine China. It gave him the feel of when you look at the grunge aesthetic side of Tumblr. That grunge, Tumblr blue that makes you want to go out and listen to the 1975. The blue that reminds you of dusk and flowers. The details astonished him- the patters, the colors, how everything just was.

The red he used to be so attracted to, seemed chaotic now- messy, even.

And why see all that red, he thought, when I could see blue instead?

AN//

Hiiii

Sorry this is a bit of a filler and hopefully I can pick things up from here.

i kinda wanted to take this as the time for apologizing for how little i've been active. i got in a fight with my mom until we make up i'm really restricted from my phone. sorry.

anyway

Are you all good? Have you been treating yourselves well? Staying hydrated? Getting some sun? Treating yourself?

Stay gold my little lambs, for as long as you can.

-S