Stay

//Torn Inside//

He texted me "I'm here".
I snuck downstairs, grabbing two things shoving them in my pocket.

I got down, and outside. Looking around for his car. He pulled up further in the driveway.

I got in and looked at him. He starting driving.
"What's up?" He said.

I sit silently, looking down at my hands, my face hurting because I was crying for hours. "I... Andy... You mean a lot to me, I don't want us to stop talking because of this..."

I see him tense up a little, as he continues to speak. "Bobbi...." He started, with a little pause.

"I've been thinking a lot about this... about us... I can't be with you, your so young, but you're cool enough to be my friend.. you know? I can be like.. a big brother for you.. what do you think?" He said, glancing at me, parking in some parking lot downtown.

I think about it, a tear running down my cheek. I look at him, wiping my face. He pulls me into his lap, looking at me.

"I still care a lot for you Bobbi." I wrap my arms around his neck, kind of intrigued. I think for a minute, before speaking. "Just being with you these past weeks have made a difference in my life. It feels like someone actually gives a damn about me." He smiles, that beautiful smile I fell for. "That's because I do."
I can't help but to pull him into a hug. He put his face in my neck, as I did the same.

We sat there in silence, hugging for what felt like forever, but it was comfortable. I pulled back, staring at him. "Thank you..."

He opened his car door, picking me up, carrying me out. "Don't thank me." He locks the doors, putting me on the ground. "Come on." He said "Lets go do something." I smile at him, remembering I have my pipe and a gram or two of weed in my pocket. "I have the perfect idea."

I grabbed his hand running, leading him down the empty, dark streets to the 'bad part' of town. I was cutting through yards, sidewalks and parking lots taking the quickest route.

"Where are we going?" He asks. I turned around "Shhh." I said with a smile, keeping my pace. We were heading to my old house that's been abandoned for years, but I'm not gunna tell him it was my old house. He'll have to find out when we get there.

I stop suddenly, as he bumps into me, grabbing my arm as he almost falls over. "Oof."
I watched him as he stared at the house. Then looked at it, remembering old memories.

"What are we doing here?" He asked, kind of warily. I look at him, trying to keep the suspense of what we were doing. I slowly turn to face him, trying to think of how to say this.

"Want to... uhh.. relax.. a little?" I say unsure if that was the right way to say it. I smile nervously. "Relax?" He said with a very suspicious voice. He looked at the old house, to me. I nodded slowly watching him.

"Suuureee.. lets go for it." He said, sounding a bit sarcastic. He pulled out his phone flashlight, following me inside. He put his arm over his nose and mouth. I look at him laughing. "What are you doing?" I said, still laughing. He glanced over at me, shaking his head. "I know I may look like a dork," I started. "But I don't want to inhale whatever is in here. I'm trying to make sure it's somewhat clean." I laugh again, making my way to the old broken staircase.

"I've been here like a million times. Everything is fine. There's nothing more than dust". I said re-assuring him. And meth chemicals I thought to myself. We sat down on the stairs. He looked at me "Oh yeah... This broken staircase.. It's sooooo relaxing it really cushions the buttocks." He said sarcastically. I laughed, reaching into my inside jacket pocket, pulling out a baggie, bowl and a lighter. "Shut up, lets have a little smoke?" I said. He grinned, watching me. "Excuse me? How old are you kid? Is this what I think it is?" he stared at me. I nodded after I got the bowl packed, lighting it. "You in?" I blew out the smoke. He hesitated then nodded.

After awhile of smoking, laughing and talking, we slump over against the railing of the stairs. He wrapped his arm around me as I crawled into his lap. "You're so amazing, Andy.." I said, unsure of what I was saying. He traced his fingers slowly up my back feeling the material on my shirt. "Mhmmm.." he said. I started telling him about my personal thoughts and feelings. I told him dark secrets hidden in my family. "Wow.. Bobbi.. You and I... We have a few things in common. No wonder I had this attraction towards you." I lift my head, staring at him. "I know... That's why I.. I didn't want to lie to you about who I am.. Erm.. my age. I feel secure enough to open up to you, and be honest and I want to feel the same way."

He watched my face as he nodded slowly. I brushed my lips across his, closing my eyes. He pushes his lips against mine, connecting the kiss. I gripped his shirt, keeping my body close to his. I know he thinks this is wrong, but right now, I just can't stop the feeling.. I want him.. I.. I need him.. He's all I have.. He now knows all my deep secrets.. He can't leave me now.. It'll break me..