Stay

.~*Where?*~.

It's been awhile since I've seen Andy.. Months, actually. He's been completely ignoring me. I figured I should've just given up.

I got out of bed and went to my mirror, looking at my hair. I had recently dyed it red, so I was obsessed with my hair. I brushed out my hair, putting it into a bun. I looked at my dresser having a self debate. "Black Bandana or black flower crown?" I said out loud to myself. I chose the bandana.

I picked out a grey sweatshirt that said "Picture me rollin", red leggings and blue jeans with holes in them. Walking downstairs I slip on my black combat boots and grab my bag and light tan car hart.

I walk out my door, plugging in my earbuds to my phone putting my playlist on shuffle. I walk to the pavilion in the park where Andy and I met. I sat there singing softly to my music, thinking about how everything was better when I never talked to anyone. It was simpler when I didn't have feelings for someone that will never give me a chance. I looked over and saw Andy behind a tree, spying on some guys. As it all clicked I got up and I walked the other way before he saw me and thought I was spying on him or something.

I walked back home and laid in my bed. My mind was racing about me seeing Andy. I should've went to say hello. No! He would've thought I was a creep. In my head everything I do is backwards. So if I go one way my brain says I should've went the opposite direction..

I sat there for hours thinking.. thinking about everything that's went wrong..

I'm so glad you made time to see me
How's life, tell me how's your family?
I haven't seen them in a while
You've been good, busier then ever
We small talk, work and the weather
Your guard is up and I know why
Because the last time you saw me
Is still burned in the back of your mind
You gave me roses and I left them there to die
So this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night
And I go back to December all the time
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to December, turn around and make it all right
I go back to December all the time
These days I haven't been sleeping
Staying up playing back myself leaving
When your birthday passed and I didn't call
And I think about summer, all the beautiful times
I watched you laughing from the passenger side
And realized I'd loved you in the fall
And then the cold came, the dark days when fear crept into my mind
You gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye
So this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night
And I go back to December all the time
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to December turn around and change my own mind
I go back to December all the time
I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile, so good to me, so right
And how you held me in your arms that September night
The first time you ever saw me cry
Maybe this is wishful thinking
Probably mindless dreaming
But if we loved again I swear I'd love you right
I'd go back in time and change it but I can't
So if the chain is on your door, I understand
But this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night
And I go back to December
It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to December turn around and make it all right
I'd go back to December turn around and change my own mind
I go back to December all the time all the time