the ultimate meme love | shrek • donald trump

steamy

donald trump

after shrek and i's interesting night, i went to bed satisfied. he is perfect, down to his shlong. i smiled looking up at the wooden ceiling.

i sat upright shocked, it had started raining and the roof of this stupid outhouse is leaking! 

"UGH!" i yelled angrily. for gods sake i cannot have a win.

i heard footsteps outside. they were loud and menacing. shrek was coming, as he opened the door i looked up at him and smiled. butterflies irrupted in my stomach. hes so cute!    

"whats wrong? i heard yer yellin'!" he said his voice loud and worried. hes such a gentleman!

i shrugged, "oh, just the rain." i gestured at the leaking ceiling.

i blushed, he stared at my soaking appearance. "fiona is gone," he paused, "if you want to come in..?" 

i nodded, thanking him. he lead me inside his house. it was cozy, the floor was rotting wood, and the walls were covered in family photos of him with his family. i frowned, i'm a home wrecker, i fondled a married man with kids for gods sake! 

i turned when i felt shrek tap my shoulder. "we recently put a shower in if you need it, there's towels in there already." he said.

i thanked him and went to the bathroom after asking him directions. there was no lock or toilet, must be why they still have an outhouse.

the mirror showed my reflection as i undressed, once i was naked. i checked to see if there was towels, there was. i turned the shower on hot. once the water was hot i jumped in. my body relaxed. i watched as the water flowed down the drain, the shower was surprisingly warm considering its a swamp shower. i closed my eyes to bask in the heat.

shrek

with the shower running i began to look through my drawer to find him clothes to put on after he got out. i hadn't thought of how i would get it to him. i figured i would just sneak it in.

as i approached the closed door with his new clothes in my big green hand, a smirk crossed my mind. 

my green hand opened the door quietly and placed the clothes on the counter. i glanced up, and saw him through the glass. his body was perfect. i wanted him again. and fully this time. 

i stepped into the room, it was hot with steam. i quietly began to strip, i was going to join him. when i was full naked i turned and checked the mirror, i put my hand on the counter next to the sink and my clumsy ass knocked a toothbrush off the counter.

"shit!" i muttered lowly. he had to have heard that.

"hello?!" his voice rang out. i had to act fast.

i quickly walked over and opened the curtain. he swirled around with a washcloth in his hand and hit me in the face. 

"what the hell!" i yelled in shock. 

he gasped, "oh my god! i'm so sorry, shrek!"

i smiled and him and started laughing. i assured him in was okay and hoped into the shower with him. he was nervous i could tell. i kissed the back of his neck and turned him around to face me. we both hardly fit in the shower together. the proximity excited me. and him too, i could feel it. 

"lets make it steamy, and not from the shower." i said slowly with a wink. he blushed and agreed. 

we made hot steamy love. 

donald trump

its been a couple days since shrek made love to me in his shower. fiona is back from wherever she was and shrek's kids are running around laughing. i felt horrible, not about the love making, but about aiding shrek in cheating on his wife, yet again. to top it off i've been feeling sick.

i stepped out of the outhouse and looked up at the stars. i looked over to where shrek was. he was with fiona laughing at something their kids did. my stomach lurched in guilt, and i turned around quickly and headed for the toilet. i spilled my guts.

a hand landed on my back and began rubbing. i looked back and saw shrek.

"how long?" he asked softly referring to my sickness.

"a couple days, since," i hesitated. 

"i think," he stuttered, lowering his voice, "i think you're pregnant." 

my body froze. i cant be, i'm a man! 

"we need a test." my voice shook as i said this. we should've been careful!

that's chapter 3. cliffhanger! is he pregnant?? you'll only know if you stick around for chapter 3! (or if you read the original)