the ultimate meme love | shrek • donald trump

hotel room 302

shrek

after our time in my old rusty rented van i returned donald back to the cafe he and his family were eating at. he told me that we had to be quick because he told them he was in the bathroom so our goodbye was brief. i wanted to stay with him longer to chat about where we stand with garth, i wanted my son to know me after all. things didnt work out that way and i set out back to the hotel where fiona and the kids were at. 

as i made my way up to the hotel my telephone dinged, i flinched, not expecting the device to do that. 

hey its donald, we can meet again at the whitehouse tonight to discuss matters surrounding garth and our future. 

always so formal, thats my donald. 

i forced the key into the door and watched as my childrens eyes lit up when they saw me. fiona was nowhere to be seen. i closed the door softly and let my kids tackle me to the ground. this is how i wanted to be with garth and donald, one can only dream. 

i ventured further in only to realize there was a teenaged human in my hotel room, "hello? who are you? where is my wife?" my angry scottish accent spat.

she cowered, "ah- sir, im jerelyn, the babysitter." 

"okay," my voice annoyed, "where is my wife." i rolled my eyes. 

she shrugged and pointed to a note on the nightstand. i slowly walked over, eying the terrified girl before turning towards the note. it was written neatly and was from fiona. it said to meet her in hotel room number 302, a floor up from where we currently were. what is she up to? this cant be good. 

guilt started eating me up. fiona tries so hard to get my affections and attention and all i can ever think about is how much i miss and want donald. i decided right then and there that up in hotel room 302 i would tell fiona everything. 

i stood facing the door. 302, here goes nothing i guess.

i knocked, "come in!" i heard her seductive voice call out. oh no. 

the door was unlocked and as i turned from closing the door. fiona was stood in the most revealing thing ive ever seen her wear, oh no x2. 

"fiona," i started, hesitating, shes trying so hard. who am i to crush her now? i married her, its the least i can do.

i walked towards her and she pulled me to the bed. we kissed, it was passionate and i could tell she was waiting eagerly for this moment. i had to give her this, i am a horrible person if i dont, right?

things got heated quick and i was still battling with myself about whether or not i should do this. i backed out and told fiona i needed a minute in the bathroom. i emptied my pockets of my shirt  on the new nightstand, including my phone. 

 looking into the mirror i couldnt recognize myself, last i looked i was a family man. now im a cheater, playing two people i was supposed to care about. i cant keep doing this.

suddenly, the door burst open and fiona stood looking furious. 

"care to explain what i just found on your phone, shrek?" my heart rate skyrocketed. oh no x3. 

"lemme see," i said, my scottishness increasing because of my nerves. 

hey shrek, i know we just had a great afternoon in the van. and i promised id talk to you about where we stand with both our relationship and son, but i just cant tonight, somebody from my past has re-emerged. 

the text meant so many things to me, id lost 3 whole people with just one text. we had to go home tomorrow i had no more chnaces to be with donald and garth. AND my wife now knows of my over year long affair, this is awful. 

hey, this is a cliffhanger because i have a headache and cant keep on writing, enjoy! (PLS VOTE)