Mental Illness

Alone

Being alone is probably the worst feeling ever, and well sometimes it's good but when you're struggling through your mental sickness, and people notice they call you 'crazy' and that is a very offending name-calling to someone with mental issues. When you're not diagnosed with mental illness then it's pretty calming to be alone. You just keep to yourself and worry about yourself. No one else's drama. But let's get to the point. You're going through a lot, okay. Totally understandable! But going through so much where you cry constantly and feel like your dead inside and want to die? Not okay, obviously. So anything like what would used to be funny won't be anymore.

And you feel alone, like no matter if you have everyone in the entire world next you. Your still going to feel alone, your still going to feel depressed, your still going to feel like no one can hear you and your stuck somewhere, where your mentally going insane. There will be times where you need someone to comfort you but your too scared to reach out to someone thinking they'll judge you and even if they don't you still wouldn't do it. Because of it causing you insecurities and so on, so it makes everything on you a lot harder.

So you try holding everything together to yourself, which means a lot of weight on your shoulder, weighing you down.

So you just keep it in, breaking down slowly by slowly. It's like-mentally your calling for someone to stay by your side and comfort you but the words don't come out at all. Your just sitting there, in the dark alone thinking about the horrible things that is making not only you, but anyone that has a mental illness insane. It's so hard... to keep it all together...

It's so hard.... to pretend your happy for so long... someday... your going to break... and we want to avoid that because it will be much worse than any other mental breakdown...