I hear my teacher talking in the background but don't pay attention to what he's saying. I hear my name get called and I feel spit balls getting thrown at me but ignore it, getting lost into my thoughts. I glance up at the clock waiting to get out of this hell. 'Only 4 minutes left' I whisper to myself.
"Stupid bitch I'm talking to you" I hear the evil preppy bitch Karen say to me. She's always bothering me and always wants to hurt me, her and her stupid friends. I turn around and glare at her wanting to say something back, but my palms start getting sweaty and my heart rate rises. I want to say all these things back to her, but my anxiety doesn't let me; It just makes it difficult to defend myself, so i keep quiet. The bell finally rings and I quickly start packing my things so I could leave before Karen could come and haunt me. I walk to my locker to stop and get my Journal, where I keep all my thoughts, drawings,poems, and lyrics. I open my locker, pull out my journal and it gets swooped out of my hands. I look right away and notice Karen's stupid boyfriend Brian, holding my book.
"Hmm what's this?" He says opening my journal with an evil smirk. Oh fuck oh fuckk no nonoooo why? My anxiety starts coming and I feel my face burning. My heart beats faster and my palms start sweating, I feel like I can't breath.
"Oh, uh, its just- uh my English journal you know?" I say while stuttering. Luckily he believes me and closes it. Well we do have English journals where we write our poems for class, so he must believe me.
"Ha stupid nerd" He says, and walks away with my meaningful journal. I slam my locker shut and and run to follow him. He walks to his girlfriend who is leaning against her locker, and leans down to kiss her.
"Hey babe, I just took Ali-sissy's English journal, do what ever you want with it" He says with a grin and leaves. ugh what a jerk! I walk up to her nervously.
"Can I have my journal back now?" I ask her annoyed.
"hmm nah, beg for it" She says
"Karen can I please have it?"
"kneel down and beg for it" she says with a evil smile. If it were something else I would have just laughed in her face and walk away, but what she's holding has all my secrets, my thoughts, practically my whole life story. So I can't let her have it any longer. I sigh and get on my knees while feeling my face flush.
"Karen can I please have my book back?" I ask, I look around and see people pointing, laughing, and taking pictures.
"Alright" she says. She walks right pass me, and throws the book into the garbage. I gasp, get up right away, and look inside the garbage can for my book. I pull it out noticing that it's a little wet. I roll my eyes annoyed and pissed off, and make my way to the bathroom so I could clean it up. why are people so rude, why can't they just be nice? Ugh I hate that bitch soo fucking much. I put my book away and finally walk out of the school and start making my way to the place I spend most of my time, the train tracks. I go there almost everyday after school to avoid going home, since home is also another hell of mine. Besides, the train tracks are also great because it's a beautiful place, where its quiet and no one's around where they can bother you, since I am anti-social. I like spending hours listening to music, draw and write in my journal. I made up a lie to my mom and say that I stay after school for tutoring, just so I could stay away from home. They're fine with it since they don't drive me back home, they don't really care what happens to me. Also, what's great is that I don't live that far from them just a couple streets away. I get to the bridge that's over the train tracks, and look down to smile at the beauty. There is two set of tracks right next to each other and it looks like it has no end. Next to them there are a lot of leave-less trees since it's the month of November. I walk to the end of the bridge, where the bridge meets the road and start climbing down to the track next to the dead grass. I sit on the grass put on my headphones and pull out my journal. I spend a couple hours there and decide to go home since its getting dark. I climb back up to the sidewalk and make my way home watching my breath in the cold air. I get there and unlock the door of my house.
"Finally you're here you piece of shit" My mom screams as soon as she sees me. As usual she's laying in the couch watching t.v and smoking a cigarette.
"Go be useful and cook" I roll my eyes and continue my way upstairs into my bedroom.
"Did you not hear your mother?" My drunken father yells.
"I don't feel very good right now" I say. My dad gets up and makes his way up to me, and pulls my hair dragging me to kitchen. He slaps me hard on the face making my eyes water and my face flush.
"Did I fucking ask you? No now cook" He yells in my face. It makes me sad when my own parents treat me like this, its just a reminder that no one likes me. I do what I was told and as soon as I'm done I go straight to my room. Skipping another meal, but I'm not even hungry so it doesn't bother me, I have other things to worry about than being hungry. I go to my room and feel instant relief letting all my agony out. I climb into bed and lay there restless letting tears slip out of my eyes, feeling empty, numb,unloved, despised,alone.
***
YOU ARE READING
Another Love Story Of A Mest Up Girl
Teen Fiction*trigger warning* School is hell, and home is hell. All Alesana wanted was someone to be there for her and help her get through it all. What will happen when it's all just to much for her, and makes her way to the train tracks?
