My Big Secret//joesugg

Chapter Five

Just as I thought. No good news. Not even that i'm getting better. He said that I needed to start chemotherapy as soon as possible. Joe stood by me the whole way. I don't want to loose my hair. It might sound silly but I really don't. I just hope that whatever happens and whatever I look like Joe, my friends and family will all be there for me. And my readers obviously. I told Zoe and Alfie the news and they said they would. 

We got home about half an hour later because we just sat in the car talking about it for around twenty minutes. I went into the living room and flopped onto the sofa (as usual) but Joe went upstairs. He's never left like that before. I tried to get up but I could barely move, I had no energy. Joe came down two hours later and said he's sorry. I didn't know what he was sorry for until he told me. This all came out of nowhere. Why did he have to do or say this? I thought he would be there for me every step of the way. He said he would. But he's not. He told me we need to take a break. How could he do this? I thought he loved me. I thought he cared for me. I know this is all a lot for him to take in but if I can do it I think he can too. Right? I burst out crying and thought that I was going to have to go through this all alone. I knew I would have to. This is why I don't trust people. They say they will do something and then they do the complete opposite. 

I managed to get up because of all the anger and I stormed to the front door. I held the handle and shouted that if he loved me he would be there for me and then I opened the door and walked outside. 

I fainted. I passed out. I fell onto the stone floor and hit my head. And Joe didn't notice. Until he had to come outside and see me. He called the ambulance for them to come immediately. They did. I got to the hospital and woke from what seemed like a trance. They said I had a serious head injury and would have to stay in hospital for at least one week. They asked me if I wanted a surgery that could kill me if they got one step wrong. I said yes. What else did I have to live for. I didn't have Joe and he is my life. Joe came rushing in when I said yes. I had the mask over my face ready for me to basically pass out again. He screamed and fell to the ground. Head in hands. He said he loved me and he was sorry, kissed me on the forehead and walked out back into waiting room. 

Now it was all up to the doctors. Will I live or will I die?