Let's Get Lost (Camila/You) Prequel To This Isn't Love

Chapter Seven

The ending of a relationship is always difficult. Y/N knew this but the day after was excruciating. Camila wouldn't even look her in the eyes or even talk to her. Y/N took time to grieve, to adjust to the new basis of her relationship with Camila - to its entirety of becoming non-existent. Whether it was due to resentment or pain, Y/N wasn't sure, but a piece of her hoped Camila and her could heal enough to at least be friends again.

As tension between them lingered, her home life grew tumultuous. Her mother had come back from the hospital, the first month was quiet as she rehabilitated herself but once she got back on her feet - the progress towards being a better mother had dwindled. She continued to visit their father in jail, acting as if her children didn't exist.

When she did acknowledge them, she targeted them, blaming them for her suicide attempt. Zayn had it the worst, constantly arguing with her on a daily basis. She'd shout "I hate you", "I wish I never had you", so many times Zayn began to believe her.

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Time continued, as Senior year rolled around - Camila and Lauren grew close. In the middle of the school year, Y/N caught sight of Camila wearing the old necklace Lauren had given her. The necklace they had their first argument over. The next day they invited her over for a conversation - that's when she realized her former best friends were getting serious.

The memory was hazy;her brain's attempt to make it as painless as possible. She had walked through the steel gates, trailing towards the front door slowly - using her senses to keep calm.

The grass squished under her feet, a fault from the morning rain failing to dry.

Her nose picked up the faint scent of Camila's perfume, a sign she'd just arrived at Lauren's house.

She knocked on the door, waiting for an answer that didn't come. So she let herself in, hearing faint giggles as she got closer to Lauren's living room. There they were, laughing in each other's presence, foreheads pressed together momentarily until Y/N cleared her throat.

"You had something to tell me?" Her nerves made her voice tremble slightly, the aura of happiness shifted into seriousness when Lauren fixed her posture - sitting up stiffly on the couch. Camila fiddled with her fingers, slouching down, avoiding eye contact.

Y/N sat across from them, meeting eyes with Lauren.

"I'm dating Camila..." Her friend breathed out and instantly a smile plastered itself on Y/N's face, just like she'd practiced. Lauren continued to speak but Y/N blocked out the excessive noise, she focused on the slight ache in her chest, the sweat seeping through her palms, and then she heard a four-letter word. One she'd heard countless times from the same girl but as reality sunk in, Y/N held herself back from running out.

"I love you." Camila's love wasn't for her anymore, it was for Lauren. She was happy, and she wouldn't dare ruin that.

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The following month after graduation, Lauren set a date for a surprise announcement.

Now Y/N understood the resentment Lauren held against her when she had been with Camila.

"Saying and seeing are two different things."

Lauren's words replayed in her head. Y/N was more hurt than jealous but unlike Lauren, she'd never admit it. She wouldn't put Lauren in the position she had once been in.

As the day of Lauren's announcement rolled around, Y/N's anxiety became overwhelming. Without Camila by her side, she often relied on her brothers to keep her calm - often having Liam soothe her with the lullaby she'd written.