There's Faith In Love.

Sleep With The Angels, Baby.

Vic.

Things settled down after the twins were born.
Michelle eventually stopped talking to Tony, and  actually regained her sanity.
I saw this as a good thing, until I found out why.

She never stopped talking to him, she just stopped telling me about it.
And the reason being, that she and Tony knew something I didn't know.
Something I wish I still didn't know.

Michelle was sick.
She was 37 years old, and had breast cancer.

For three more years, it was in and out of hospitals, chemotherapy, radiation, and finally remission.

I thought everything was okay, until one night she wasn't feeling well, so we took her back to the hospital.
Turns out, the cancer was back, and it was worse than it had ever been, attacking her still weak and frail body.

Fifteen hours later, my Michelle, my beautiful wife, and best friend, was gone.

Just as easily as she'd come into my life, she was gone forever.

Madison shut down. She wouldn't talk to anyone, or even come out of her room.
Adam locked himself in his room too.

All the kids were mad.
They all, even the twins, reacted badly to losing their mother.
None of them attended the funeral we had for her.
We buried her next to Tony, where she belonged all along.

Sarah didn't come to the funeral either. She was crushed. She didn't even live in San Diego anymore, she'd moved away to Ventura with James.

"Madison, you have to eat. Come out."
"No dad. I'm fine. I just want to be alone."
"Your mother would kick your ass for acting like this."
"MOM IS NOT HERE ANYMORE DAD! MOMS GONE!" She yelled.
I stepped back, fighting tears.
"Alright. I'll save you a plate." I finally replied.

I heard the door behind me open and I saw my son.
He too,  had tears in his eyes, "Dad?"
I hugged him, "She's not in pain anymore son. She's happy again. She's with Tony, Marisa and Keaton now."
"Why our mom? Why? She was so special. She was a great mother, and she never hurt anybody. Why her?"

"Because Adam, life is an ugly thing, like that. It's terrible, because when you love someone, you know in the Darkest corners of your mind and the deepest pits of your heart, that death is waiting, to snatch them away at any moment. And there's nothing you can do to stop it." it happened to your mom three times, and to me three times now as well."

He sniffled, and wiped his nose with his sleeve.
"She was my mom. Nobody should ever have to lose their mom this way."
I snorted, "You'd think by now they'd have an indefinite cure for it by now."

Adam looked over my shoulder at Madi's door.
"She never got over her dad dying. Ever. She pretended she's been okay for the last five years, but she's not. She hasn't been. I'm scared that now I'm going to lose her too."

I shook my head, "Like hell. I'm not going to let anything happen to her. If I did, I'd be letting her dad down, your mom down, and I'd be letting all of you down too. I know she was hurt. I'm going to keep this family together. Even if it kills me next."

Adam looked up at me, and for the first time since he was born 12 years ago, I saw her in him. His hopeless eyes reminded me of. Michelle, when she felt like she could not go on anymore.
My heart broke in that moment.

I hugged my son, "Adam, I never want you to forget how much your mother loved you. All of you. Because she'd have killed for you, she did things in her life that she didn't want to do, for you kids. She went through a lot for you guys, and to hear you talk about losing your sister would be enough for her to fight the good fight, just to be here for you guys. She didn't want to leave you. But her poor body was in ruins. She'd have kept fighting if we'd let her. But she was tired. We assured her that you were safe, and told her to let go. And after she kissed me and told me she loved us, she went. Peacefully. She's free now. She's in Tony's arms again, where she belongs. I don't want you kids to think she abandoned yo-"

"Dad, we know mom didn't die because she wanted to. She died because it was her time. Because she'd done what she was put in this earth to do. She fought the good fight for 37 long years. I know she was tired, she had every right to be. I'm mad at the way she died. I hated seeing the strongest woman I knew, wither away to nothing  like that. She was great, and then she was falling apart. It's not fair for a good woman to go out that way. But like grandma always says, God works in mysterious ways. I agree, because I don't at all understand  why he would take my mom that way."

I smiled, "Well, all I can say, is that I have heard that dying is like falling asleep. Peaceful, and quick. And I know that at the end, that your mother fell asleep for the last time, knowing that her duty, her purpose had be fulfilled. She fell asleep with a smile on her tired, aging face. She wasn't miserable for that last moment, because she was free. Finally, after the life of hardship and misery that she lived, she was free. Just think of that. Don't think about the cancer destroying her, think of how she's finally free. "

He smiled," She's free. Happy and free."
I hugged him, "She will never cry again. Never be sad, or hurt. She'll only smile, from today on."

" She's an angel, the most beautiful angel, now."
We turned to see Micah standing behind us, with tears in her eyes.
"That's right Mimi. She's an angel."
"Mom, we still love you so much." she sobbed.
"She knows Micah. She will never forget her reasons for living. All ten of them."

"Vic."
I looked up to see my niece, Luna, who lived there hours away with her mom.

She had tears in her eyes, "I just found out this morning. I demanded mom let me come down here." she rushed in to hug us.
"I'm sorry. I can't believe my favorite aunt is gone." she cried.
"There you are, Luna." Mike embraced his daughter.
"She taught me a lot of important lessons. She was like my second mother." Luna whispered.

At this point, we were in a big group hug, me, Adam, Micah, Luna, now also Isaiah, Fred and George, Molly, and finally, Madison.

"We lost the back bone of the family, what are we going to do now?" Madison asked.

I straightened up, "We'll go on, like your mother would want to us to. We'll keep it together, for her. Because she didn't work her whole life to make this family while, just for us to fall apart without her. For her, we're going to be strong and go on, with smiles on our faces. Mom would be proud of us. She is proud."

              Michelle Marie Perry
   December 26, 1984 - July 15, 2017
         Flying high with the angels.
                We love you mom.

The end. ❤️❤️❤️❤️