Miracle | Zarry Christmas AU [COMPLETE]

FIVE

"Hey, H." Zayn leaned in to kiss his husband upon arriving home, but Harry leaned out of his hold. Oliver, three years old, screeched with delight upon seeing his father.

"Daddy!" he cheered.

"Hi, bub!" Zayn chuckled, taking Oliver out of Harry's arms. Harry wouldn't look Zayn in the face. "Harry? What's wrong?"

Harry scratched the back of his neck. "It's in the kitchen."

"What is?"

Harry just turned, leading the way.

"Is this how we are now? Not even talking to each other?" Zayn asked. Harry continued to not answer, just led the way into the kitchen.

Zayn knew what the forms were before he was close enough to read them.

"Harry..."

"Everything has been different since Oli was born. And I'm not blaming him -- you know I adore him, Zayn. But things between us...they've changed, and I can't pretend like it's the same."

Zayn stepped closer to him. "You know we can get through this, H. I love you. Just tell me you love me, too..." He paused. "I know things have been different. We've both been so stressed...but it doesn't change how I feel about you. Just say the word and we can get through this."

Harry pursed his lips. He did still love Zayn, of course...but he also knew that their relationship wasn't perfect, and that Zayn would be happier without him.

"Okay," Zayn replied, interpreting Harry's silence. "If it's what you want."

- - -
"Zayn," Harry calls. There's so much he wants to say in response to what Zayn just said.

"Daddy, Papa, let's play hide and seek," Oliver pleads.

"In a second," Harry says at the exact second that Zayn says, "Okay." Harry glares at Zayn. After making a confession like that, he's trying to avoid whatever Harry's response is.

"One, two, three..."

Zayn runs out of the room to find a place to hide, which makes Harry laugh. Harry decides to hide behind the couch, his classic spot, but when he squeezes into the space, Zayn is already back there.

"Hey!" Harry hisses. "Move, this is my spot!"

"I was here first!"

Harry huffs at him. He can still hear Oliver counting, so he makes a move to get out from behind the couch, but Zayn grabs his arm.

"Wait," he whispers.

Harry waits, but Zayn doesn't say anything, so he whispers, "If you still loved me, why did you sign the divorce papers?"

"It was what you wanted," Zayn responds, confused. "I just wanted you to be happy."

"...I didn't really want you to go," Harry whispers back. "It's my fault that we're strangers now. It's too late, and I've messed everything up."

"Ready or not, here I come," Oliver calls, voice delighted. Immediately, he thunders up the stairs, away from Harry and Zayn.

"It's not too late," Zayn says very softly. "Never."

"I'm really sorry," Harry whispers.

"Don't be. I always hoped you'd make your way back home to me," Zayn whispers. His hands are touching Harry's face, his fingers rough and warm like always. The familiarity is wonderful, it makes tears sting at Harry's eyes. "What's wrong? Why are you crying?"

"I've just -- I miss you," Harry says pathetically. "I miss you, and my missing you is all my fault. I...the guilt is gonna kill me, I think..."

"It's okay. Everything is okay," Zayn soothes gently. "I'm here. I won't leave you again."

Harry has to fight back a sob at that. Somehow his fingers have knotted themselves in the collar of Zayn's shirt, and his face moves closer to Zayn's...

And Zayn kisses him.

And oh, how Harry has missed this. Kissing anyone else has felt wrong...but kissing Zayn feels so safe. So familiar. Kissing Zayn feels like returning home after a long time away, back somewhere that has always loved you.

Zayn pulls back, apologizing, but Harry reels him back in. Harry can feel Zayn smiling into the kiss and his heart is bubbling over. He's overflowing with what he's feeling. Overflowing with Zayn's fingers in his hair, fingers gentle, overflowing with Zayn's soft mouth and gentle hold. Harry feels like he might die, he's so overwhelmed.

Then he hears a tiny, smug voice say, "I found you!"

When Harry turns, Oliver is beaming at his fathers, broken arm cradled to his chest.