That's Madness (a Skyrim fanfiction)

Chapter Four - Sanctuary

I don't seek out Astrid for a week. Instead I spend most of my time in my room, ignoring people. Lydia leaves me food outside of my room and I sometimes eat it. Blaise and Lucia are almost always clamouring for me to come out and I've almost caved in a few times. I just really don't know what to do about it. I should go and visit Astrid and see what the Brotherhood has to offer for me. It wouldn't hurt to just have one look, would it? I sigh and force myself to sit up. I don't want to leave my bed. But then I notice my pretty glass armour and how neglected it is. I haven't used my bow in a while either. Or my daggers.

But my morality is screaming at me to stop. To tell someone that I know where the Brotherhood is and that I know the password to get inside of their Sanctuary. I would surely be rewarded and my parents would be proud of me...or would they ask questions? Perhaps they'd ask me why I lied about being taken by vampires or why I didn't speak up sooner. Or maybe they'd make the connection between a group of murderers making contact with me immediately after a murder had taken place in Riften. A murder that had occurred when I wasn't in Mistveil Keep and a murder that had happened right after I arrived in Riften and right before I was taken. Or maybe I'm just looking into this too much...

I step out of bed and I wince when I catch a glimpse of myself in the looking-glass. My hair is knotted, messy and greasy and I'm also in desperate need of a bath. I change out of the tunic I've been wearing all week and slip into some comfortable leather armour. I won't wear the glass one...yet. I unlock my bedroom door and I'm surprised when I see Lydia sitting outside my room, reading some kind of book.

"Lydia?" I clear my throat. "Is there...are there any sweetrolls in the house?"

Lydia jumps and looks up, startled. "Maryse?"

I smile at her sheepishly. "Hi. Um, I feel like going to Jorrvaskr today,"

I'll make my decision of whether or not I should pursue being in the Dark Brotherhood today. And then tomorrow I'll either seek out Astrid or I'll forget the whole thing ever happened, but something tells me it won't be as easy as that. After I eat some food with Lydia, she walks with me to Jorrvaskr. We make small talk, not dwelling on the past week. Lydia doesn't go into Jorrvaskr with me and I go around the building to the training court. The second Lucia sees me, she drops the greatsword she's practicing with and sprints towards me, wrapping me in a huge bear hug.

"Lucia! Don't just drop your weapon!" I hear Uncle Farkas shouting. Then he catches sight of me and he too drops his weapon and joins the hug. "I can't believe you finally left your room!"

"Uncle Farkas, don't be so insensitive," Lucia scolds. I laugh, it would be just like her to scold her uncle. Out of the three of us (me, her and Blaise), she's easily the bravest. 

Uncle Farkas and Lucia yell at my father to come and say hello to me. They're the only ones outside, aside from Eorlund who's up at the Skyforge.

Father doesn't drop his weapons, but instead places it back on its grip on his back and then he hugs me tightly. "We've been worried about you,"

"I'm okay now," I smile. "Where's mother? I want to talk to her,"

"Inside, in her study. She's dealing with some requests from Jarl's to wipe out several bandit hideouts," father informs me. "I love you, Maryse,"

"I love you too, father,"

I'm not going to tell my mother that I saw the Dark Brotherhood, I'm not that stupid. But I'm going to try and get some advice from her. She understands I don't want to be part of the Companions, so at least she won't force me to stay in Whiterun forever. I slip into Jorrvaskr and I ignore everyone inside calling my name. I don't really want to speak to them. I head down into the Living Quarters and stroll into my mother's study.