Violet

Chapter 32: Blah Blah Blah

They left me with the kids around 8 PM. I was glad I didn't have to stay up with them for hours. Around 8:30 PM, I helped Kellin and Zachery get ready for bed. April had already taken a shower, brushed her teeth, and changed into her pajamas.

The boys and I read a book about hockey and while I read, they wore their hockey masks. That was what they called them. However, the mask looked like something you would find in a cheap Halloween store for fifty cents. Their masks were white with uneven slits for eyes. Each had a different mask with a weird mouth shape.

I said goodnight to the boys after I had finished reading to them. There was no need to check on April, mostly because I didn't want to. I figured she was asleep because her lights were off. While the kids slept, I went into the living and studied. I was reading about religion for history class and came across a part about sacrifices. I'd never understand how anyone could sacrifice a baby or something and think of it as holy. I also read that some people would sacrifice to devils to get something they desired in return.

I was getting tired of reading and eventually drifted off to sleep. I woke when I heard someone close their door. April walked into the living room with her mask on, holding some dolls with strings attached to them and a decorated box. She put the box on the living room floor then stood behind it.

"Ladies and gentlemen," she called out. "It's time for my puppet show."

"What?" I groaned, then looked at the clock on the wall. "Go back to bed, it's 11:46."

She pouted. "I want to show you my puppet show. Let me show you!" she screamed.

"Go to bed," I demanded.

"Let me show you my puppet show!" she screamed, this time louder than before.

I sat up, frustrated. "Hurry up," I said through gritted teeth.

She held up a girl puppet who looked exactly like me. "Oh no, I can't see anything," she said, trying to sound like me. A boy puppet slowly crept behind my puppet. "You're dead," the boy puppet whispered. She laid me on the box as if I had died. The boy puppet's arms raised into the air. "It's not too late. You can join us or you can die," the boy puppet said. My puppet then stood up and raised her hands in the air. "I will join you!" she said. April put a little rainbow in between both puppets and made them dance. She added one more puppet and it looked like a man. It looked like... my father. He hugged the boy and girl puppet and all of them raised their hands in the air. "Now we'll be happy forever."

No words. I had no words for what I had just seen. I had this bad feeling in my stomach and I felt like throwing up. April cleaned up her mess and went back to her room without saying anything. I just sat there. Sat there until my mother came back home.

***

"Violet?" Liz said.

I lifted my head up for the hundredth time, but it slowly slumped down again. "What's up with you?" Liz asked. "This is like the second day you came to school looking like a-"

"Liz, before you insult someone, look at your shirt," Desire said, smiling. Mariel laughed. Liz's shirt was inside out.

"You couldn't have told me sooner?" Liz asked.

"I just noticed," Desiree replied. The two of them laughed as Liz excused herself to the bathroom. "I'll come with." Desiree followed her.

Mariel tapped the back of my hand that rested on the table along with my head. I sat up to face her. "Hey, if you ever need someone to talk to," she shrugged. "I'm around. You don't look so good."

"I don't feel so good," I replied, leaning on my hand. "I feel like a character in a bad horror movie or something."

Mariel nodded. "I know the feeling," she said. She leaned her head on her hand like me and I noticed the cuts again. One looked new. She noticed I was staring and folded her arms.

"Do you cut yourself?" I asked. I wasn't trying to come off as rude but once I let it out, I regretted asking.

She chuckled and looked at the table. "Yeah."

"Doesn't that hurt?" I asked. "Why cut?"

She shrugged. "Sometimes. It stings, too. I find it pleasing for a few minutes. Makes me feel stronger. Those feelings don't last for long. The hardest part isn't cutting. The hardest part is the feeling you get after you've cut. The feeling when you realize what you're doing won't change anything but you know you'll be right back in that position because every day gets worse and worse." She smiled at me. "But every day is a new day and things will change right?" I heard the sarcasm in her voice.

"I'm sorry, Mariel," I said. "Maybe things will change. You're a good goalie and you get the highest grades in class. You're going somewhere in life."

"Thanks," she said, making me feel like what I had just said was garbage.

The girls came back as soon as the bells rung. "What took you guys so long?" Mariel asked them.

"Desiree and I were singing in the bathroom," Liz said.

"You guys are idiots," Mariel said.

All of us walked to class. The day seemed to take forever. I didn't pay attention to anything. I didn't feel like I existed. I was just a zombie walking and throughout the day, all I heard was blah blah blah.