The Suicide Project

Chapter 2: The Project

"Alex, can't you tell me exactly what happened?"

I shake my head. "I can't. They'd kill me if I did. I wouldn't mind."

"Alex!" Mr. Lambert looks at me, shocked. I shrug my shoulders.

"It's the truth," I say. "I have been bullied so much before. No one seems to care. Not even my family. I have no friends, only one that used me for her homework. I had another one but he ditched me because of... certain reasons." A blush creeps across my cheeks. There's no way I can tell him about Christopher. I continue. "I'm not pretty or attractive in any way whatsoever. No one would care if I killed myself."

This is a very long speech, and when I'm done Me. Lambert looks a bit puzzled, but understands. He also looks sorry for me. Sympathy isn't something that I've received before, so I am not sure how to react to it. 

I remember that after I came to I woke up in Mr. Lambert's room, on his couch. Yes, he has a couch. He's also one of the most popular teachers at our school. Quite young, about twenty three, so a lot of students have a crush on him. I don't, but he is my favorite teacher, for his classes are interesting and he's a nice person overall.

So after I woke up, he wrapped a blanket around me and gave me a cup of something called hot chocolate, which I have never tasted before. It tastes good, with whipped cream and shavings of chocolate drizzled on it, and a bright striped straw in it. He then bombarded me with questions about who hurt me and how, and that's why we are still sitting here right now, for I am refusing to tell anything. 

I sip out of the straw slowly, and let the warm drink heat me up. A creamy, chocolatey taste fills my mouth and I feel it slither down my throat. Mmm... It tastes so good. It's not often that I have a great like this. I lick the whipped cream off my upper lip then I suddenly realize that Mr. Lambert hasn't said anything for sometime, just watching me sip the cocoa.

He snaps his fingers. "Was it Natasha?"

I blush, and feel the urge to pull the covers over my head. Damn it. He guessed it. He fricking guessed it. I should have known. It's not a mystery that she hates me with all her heart. He looks mad. Very mad. To my surprise, he gets up from his chair, pacing the room.

"I should have known," he mutters angrily. He turns to me. "Was May in on it too?" Once again I nod my head and he curses. I feel surprised to be in the presence of a teacher using crude language, but I don't feel too uncomfortable surprisingly. Maybe I'm still knocked in the head. Or maybe because deep down I'm taking a tiny bit of pleasure to see someone dislike Natasha and May. 

Then again, I can see why Mr. Lambert doesn't like Natasha. Or May. They are one of those students who have a crush on him, and they try to do good in his class to please him but come with failing marks still. They flirt with him and he, as a teacher, cannot be rude to them so he acts oblivious, although the whole class can see that he's just bearing with them. It's kind of funny really. I think about my own grades. My marks aren't the best, but they're above average, which is good enough for me, considering I live in a rundown house with drunk parents.

"Alexis, you need to tell me this," he says, using my real name. "As a teacher, I need to know. Anytime from now on, you can come to me. I won't say anything. I promise."

"But you're a teacher," I say. "You don't understand how mean these kids are. How can you help me?"

"Because I'm a teacher," he winks, contradicting my own words. I sigh then nod. It's worth a try. He smiles and pulls the blanket off me. "You can stay with me, for you have me fifth period anyway." This is probably why he is talking to me. It's lunch time. I glance at the clock. Yep, lunch period is almost over. I must have been in the teacher's lounge, then they brought me here at the beginning of lunch. I feel bad, knowing that I probably wasted his lunch time. I can see him start to open a container and know that he hadn't eaten yet. 

The bell rings, indicating passing period. I walk to my desk then patiently wait for everyone to arrive. I hope they don't. I feel embarrassed for suddenly passing out like that, and I don't want to face the looks on everyone's faces. 

The room starts to fill and people stare me, some smirk and some are sympathetic. I ignore them all and just stare at Mr. Lambert's desk. A hot blush creeps unwillingly across my cheeks, and I feel angry at myself for blushing. Now they all know that I'm embarrassed. I feel someone tug at my ponytail and look to see May smirking. 

"Stop it," I say angrily. 

May looks surprised. Really surprised. "Well, I didn't know rats could speak."

"I didn't know that pigs could either." I find that the words roll off my tongue easily. Natasha and May stare at me in surprise, like I've discovered another element of something. Then May gets a nasty look on her face and fear fills me. 

Luckily for me, class starts and he comes out and sits on his desk. May and Natasha instantly jump into their assi

"Hello class, now today before we get to our lesson, I have to talk to you about something," he says. We all stare back at him. "Well, we are going to be doing a special type of project. It has to be creative and affect the world around you. You must not tell anyone what you are doing, for then you will get an automatic zero." I hear May and Natasha gasp with indignity, and I can't help smirking at that. Mr. Lambert continues. "This project will be 75% of your final grade." Now the whole class gasps. I do too. A whole 75%?! Of our FINAL grade! Is he crazy?

He goes on with the lesson, but throughout the whole period I keep thinking about what I am going to do for the project.Affect the world around me huh? Well, what can I do?  

As the bell rings, indicating the end of the period, it suddenly comes. Just jumps right in my head. Such a good idea! As the students file out of the classroom, I walk up to Mr. Lambert's desk. I don't care if I'm late to sixth period.  

 "Mr. Lambert?" 

"Yes?" 

"I think I have a project idea, and I need you to help me with it."