Chapter1
Hi, my name is Chasity Ramirez and this is my story.
“I was only 4 years old when my parents died in the car accident back in 2002, I remember seeing the flames, the fire department, and people screaming and wondering what’s going on… I always wondered ‘Would I ever see my parents again?’ Since that day, I had to move in and live with my dad’s brother, my uncle Ernesto, and that was a living hell. ‘Why?’ you ask? Let me tell you …
“Uncle Ernesto?” I asked.
“What do you want?” he growled.
“Where’s the food?” I asked, ignoring his rude attitude.
“You know what? Your fat behind is always eating, asking for food, how about you get a job or just leave my house!” he said.
“Uncle, I’m only 16! I can’t survive on my own.” I said.
“I don’t care.” He said as he started strapping up to inject heroin into his arm.
“I hate you.” I mumbled.
“Ayo .. Chasity?” He said, high off the heroin. “Come here… and sit on my lap.”
I did as told, before something went down.
“You know, you’re my favorite niece right? And that body of yours… Mm…” he said as he felt on me. I was very uncomfortable and I tried to get off his lap but his grip got tighter and started to hurt.
“Where ya going?” He asked.
“This doesn’t feel right, please stop your hurting me!” I screamed.
“Shut up!!” He yelled.
“Leave me alone!” He yelled as he started to run after me. Then all I felt was something hit my head then I blacked out.
When I woke up, I was naked and in my uncle’s bed.
“Oy, ve …” I groaned. This wasn’t the first time he’d raped me, and that surely wasn’t the last. He did it for YEARS until he died of an overdose on heroin.
Later on that year, my mom’s sister, Inez; I called her “Auntie Nezzy” got custody of me. That was another hell. I ended up leaving Queens, New York and going to Brooklyn, New York.
Now let me tell you how that went down.
“Auntie Nezzy, I wanted to tell you how much I thank you for taking me in.” I said.
“Don’t think this is the glamorous life. I only took you in cause your parents and then Ernesto died.” She said bluntly.
“Oh, okay. But thanks anyway.” I said trying to hold back my tears and anger.
“Okay, we’re here.” She said as we pulled up to her apartment complex in the Flatbush area of Brooklyn, near Eastern Parkway.
When we got in the apartment, I saw my 7 cousins: Sofia, Jose, Santiago, Ximena, Xanella, Marco and Mateo, The quads. They we’re all older than me, and didn’t even say “Hello or hey Chas!” to me. I was just invisible.
“Santi, please help Chasity with her stuff. Show her to the guest room in the back.” She told him.
“Why do I have to do it? She can do that by herself! She has stayed over here before right?” he protested as the others nodded in agreement.
“I have to start dinner, just help her, jeez” Aunte Nezzy said irritated.
“Ugh, fine. I’ll help the little troll.” He groaned as he came over to me and snatched my things.
“Be careful with that, my mom gave me that.” I said.
“Does it look like I care?” he snapped.
I stayed quiet.
“Here’s your room. You can fetch your other things, mutt.” He laughed as he walked away from the room.
“Welcome to paradise.” I said sarcastically as I went to get my things.
When I finished I heard my aunt.
“Dinners ready, guys!” My aunt called out to us.
“What did you make?” Xanella and Ximena asked.
“Your favorite: Arroz con pollo.” She replied.
“Mmm… sounds great, I’m starved.” I said, getting ready to sit and eat.
“Are you sure? Cause you don’t looked starved.” Sofia said as they all laughed at me.
“Dinner is served guys.” Aunt Nezzy said as she gave us our plates.
“Don’t scarf it all down at once, Ms. Piggy.” Jose said as Santiago, Marco and Mateo snickered.
“Um … Can I please eat in my room, Auntie?” I asked.
“I don’t allow that in my home. Sorry.” She said
“You scared huh?” Marco asked.
“No.” I said bluntly.
“Why you lying? Matter of fact why are you even here? Just cause your parents died doesn’t mean you have to sit your fat, ugly behind here and mooch off of us! Hell, you had Uncle Ernesto starving that’s why he died.” Mateo stated.
“If you knew the real truth, you sit there, eat your words, choke on them and die slowly.” I said in a low tone as I walked away from the table and went into my room and cried so hard.
“I thought I had a family. Family is supposed to love each other right? Why does my family hate me so much?” I thought to myself as I sobbed.
Then I noticed my diary and started to write.
“Dear Diary,
Life has been so hard these years since my parents died when I was little.
One of these days I think I may end up in a mental asylum or something. I can’t take it anymore. The abuse from Uncle Ernesto was one thing but my cousins? Sofia, Jose, Santiago, Ximena, Xanella, Marco and Mateo are waaaaaay different. It’s seven against one. I ask all the time ‘Why do I have to be so unlucky?’ I hope god shows me some signs that things would turn out well for me.
Until then… Bye diary.”
Then I quietly prayed to myself:
“Padre Celestial, vengo a ti en el nombre de Jesús a favor dame la fuerza para despertar y ver otro día. Lo que está pasando en mi vida y espero que pronto se puede arreglar. ¿Por favor? No 16 años de edad debe estar pasando por lo que tengo que pasar. Por favor, sólo ver a mi manera a través. También, por favor cambiar la forma en que mis primos me mira, yo no quiero hacer daño a nadie, y no me a nadie para hacerme daño. Bueno eso es todo lo que tengo que decir a partir de ahora. En el nombre de Jesús oro, Amén.”
(Translation: Heavenly father, I come to you in the name of Jesus to please give me the strength to wake and see another day. You what's going on in my life and I hope soon you can fix. Please? No 16 year old should be going through what I have to go through. Please just see my way through. Also please change the way my cousins look at me, I don't want to hurt anybody, and I don't anyone to hurt me. Well that’s all I have to say as of right now. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.)
I went to sleep to get ready for the day that changed everything about me.
