Not so average poetry

Midnight

Typing this hurts like hell, but you guys are worth it so here you go. Be thankful you lil shzs
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I sit here alone on the roof,
It's almost midnight.
I don't know if you can hear me,
But do you remember?
Remember when it was you here with me?
You said you loved the midnight sky.
The bright shining stars
In contrast with the deep blue sky.
To you it resembled our lives.
The stars were our hope
And the Sky the cruelty of the world.
I wish I had listened to those words closely.
I wish I could still hear your voice in my head,
But I guess you are better off dead.
Remember how you said you would call?
How'd you never let yourself go down alone?
Why didn't you!
Why didn't you call!
I would have been there!
Right beside you.
I guess that noose was just too tempting,
But that rope necklace kept you from flying.
And that was your only dream,
To fly away and be free.
You know I saw your mom a while back
She's deathly thin,
And refuses to move on from the past.
But nobody cared about you right?
That's what you said in your letter.
Well your death was tragic,
And now your mom hasn't eaten in days.
She dwells on everything she could've done differently.
Her eyes are tear stained and sleep deprived.
She lays at night wondering where she went wrong.
How couldn't she see that you were being too strong?
I know you don't want her to blame herself.
You only believed that no one would care.
That it wouldn't hurt anyone.
Now we all think,
How could we have changed our ways?
But now it's too late!
Your sister wonders where you went.
She's too young to understand.
She thinks it because of her.
All the times she stole your things,
And taunted you.
She misses those nights
when she would come and lay in your bed with you,
But now those sheets are empty.
Your room is like a museum.
No one ever enters it.
Was this what you really wanted?
What about the day
when those bullies stood at your grave?
They cried and spoke words of love.
But the original words said,
Pushed you over the edge.
Fat, ugly, worthless, go die!
It's that last one they can't take back.
Now I look at the stars in the midnight sky
And see you blow a kiss goodnight.
Now you are what you loved.
A star shining bright above.
Watch over me darling,
Give me strength to continue,
To face the cruelty of this world.
Be my HOPE.
For you know how to face this life.
It was always you against the world.
I'll remember the words in your letter forever.
Its as if I can hear you say them.
"I doubt any one cares, but to those who have read this I want to apologize. I didn't mean to hurt you or make you sad, please don't cry. Just understand this was for the best. Mom and dad please don't hate me. Don't let this break you apart, just look to the stars and say goodbye. To my friends you helped me survive. None of you have done wrong. I was just strong for too long.
None of you saw the scars, lies, and tears. I'm sorry I hid so much from you all. I'm sorry I couldn't stick around. I'm sorry I was such a mistake. Now it's my time tonight. GOODBYE<3 "
Those were the last words we had from you.
Now darling as this comes to an end,
I stare at the stars one last time,
Imagining you by my side
with awe in your eyes.