Battlefield ★ Bucky Barnes

XLIV. I'm Ready To Accept Your Offer

With a sigh of content, Connie rolled over in bed. She stretched her arm out as if to locate Bucky's body, but the space beside her was empty, much to her confusion. Connie frowned and opened her eyes, pulling her blanket over her bare body as she sat up. She looked around the room, her eyes falling on the clock hanging on the wall. It was nearing 11 in the morning, so Connie assumed Bucky had woken up earlier.

Connie hopped off the bed and onto the floor, hurrying over to her bag to grab a change of clothes. After putting on some undergarments, she threw on a plain black shirt and a pair of black skinny jeans. Just as Connie was about to head out of her room, an envelope sitting by the sink caught her attention, and her brows furrowed in slight confusion. She walked over to pick it up from the countertop, her brown eyes scanning carefully over her name written in the familiar handwriting on the front of the envelope. It was from Bucky, but what she couldn't understand was why he had left it for her.

With a swift movement of her hands, Connie had ripped the envelope open. She pulled out a small slip of paper and unfolded it, wasting no time at all in reading over the words written on the page.

Connie,

If you're reading this, I'm probably gone. Where am I? I don't know. Where will I go? Once again, I don't know. All I know is that I had to leave in order to keep you and Steve safe. Hydra will never stop looking for me as long as I'm alive, and that's a burden I can't put on yours or Steve's shoulders. I know you can take care of yourself against just about anyone, including me, but I would never be able to live with myself if you were harmed or even killed because of me. I almost lost you a couple days ago, and for a few minutes I did. It might not appear this way from your perspective, but you almost died because of me, Connie--you almost died trying to save me, and that's something I can't allow to happen, no matter the circumstance. The only thing I knew I could do to prevent it from happening was to leave, and it's something that's torn me apart from the inside-out.

I love you, Constance Mae. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone, and that's something I will always be sure of. Never ever forget that. You brought me back. You showed me who I truly was inside. You saw me and said I was worth saving, and I will forever be grateful to you because of that.

I'm so sorry that things have to be this way, and if I had any choice they wouldn't be this way. Just know that I'm doing this because I love you. I'm doing this because I care more about you than I care about myself. I hope to see you again someday, I really do. I just hope when that time comes, things will have changed. Maybe by some strange miracle, Hydra will have been eliminated and we can be together again? I'd really like that.

Goodbye, Connie.

With love,

James Buchanan

The moment Connie finished the small letter she sat it back down on the table in which she grabbed it from and cried. The tear spilled from her eyes without much control on her part. Her heart was broken, and she wondered if she'd ever find a fix.

Not only was Connie absolutely brokenhearted, she was very angry. She wondered how it was so easy for him to leave her after everything the two had been through during the last couple of months. She wondered how it was so easy for him to look her in the eye the previous and promise her that he would always be there, only for him to break that promise the very next day.

Connie couldn't begin to understand why he had decided to do what he did; not even his letter could help her determine why. Sure, he was afraid of her putting her in danger while Hydra was in pursuit of him, but as he wrote, Connie could take care of herself perfectly fine against anyone. Even now, without the serum running through her veins, her determination and her will to fight for those she loved made her more than capable. She just wished he had taken that into consideration before leaving her.