A new life (a blackveilbrides fanfic)

agony and regret

India’s POV

I got up shakily, holding onto CCs arm as if it was a buoyancy aid and I was at sea, I let go of CCs arm once I had gotten up but I simply collapsed into a heap on the floor, the tears ran down my face, I couldn’t stop them I just cried while CC tried to mop me up, then he left and said that he’d be back, I curled up on the floor, I heard CC telling the guys that the bathroom would be occupied for a while seeing as I couldn’t move and then her returned carrying blankets and pillows, he placed them down around me and told me to get comfy, when I didn’t move however he started lifting my head and placing pillows underneath me, then using the rest of the pillows to surround me so that I felt like I was in a nest.

I thought that he was going to leave after I was comfortable, but instead he sat down next to me leaning against the bath, he began to talk to me, in a soft voice, he talked about how much he was worried about me and how he wished that I would let him take me to hospital, I knew that I couldn’t, I shook my head and he sighed, we kept talking until he lay down next to me cuddling me and drawing circles on my arm with his finger, we continued talking and  eventually we both fell asleep.

I woke up to the sun streaming through the little window that provided the only light, the buss moved and I realised we were moving, “CC, wake up CC!”

“Wha-what I’m up what’s happening are you okay?”

“Yeah I’m fine, we’re moving though, and where are we going?” I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t asked already. CC jumped up, but then knelt down; he felt my forehead and asked how I felt.

“I’m fine, really, but I don’t feel strong enough to get up yet” I lied, I actually felt as though my stomach was going to burst open from all of the pain, CC looked at me, clearly my forehead told the truth. CC left to get me some food and water. I groaned, I was positive that I wouldn’t be able to eat it, while CC was gone I shuffled around and propped myself up on the bath, it took CC a good 10 minutes to come back with a plate of bacon and eggs, I breathed in the smell which was a bit odd but I forced myself to eat, I ate as quickly as possible trying to ignore the pain that occurred every time I swallowed, I was sure that CC could tell, I was wincing so much it was obvious, I tried to breath after that but I began hyperventilating, CC practically jumped onto me to help me breath, instead I crawled out from under him and lent into the toilet, the water seemed so peaceful until I threw up, It went on for a life time, with CC stroking my hair, telling me that I was fine and that it would be over while the tears streamed down my face silently. Andy and the rest of them knocked on the door several times asking if they could help, CC always said no, until Juliet came in, she didn’t knock just came in and sat down on my other side, she told CC to leave and clean himself up, and to get rid of the food and bring water etc, I thanked her in-between gagging, I hated myself for making CC sleep on the floor, I barley knew him and he probably hated me, only looked after me out of charity, nut what did i care, I hated myselfanyway. When CC came back juliet left, but not before telling me that she had bought me new clothes, I sighed, CC took back his original position until I stopped after what felt like a life time, the toilet was flushed and CC lay me down back onto the pillows which he carefully arranged around me and lay back down beside me, “tell me, I look like shit, right?” CC paused, I laughed a bit but then scrunched up, balling my hands into fists with the pain, “its not to bad” he said hugging me “I mean it could be worse, you could look like Ashley” I laughed again and pain shot through me like a knife, CC stopped talking, and I just relaxed, as much as I could, into his arms.