Hello, mother, I mouth at her. She isn't looking at me though. Glancing around the room, inspecting my work. Step step step step step. Walks around the room. I hold my breath. Finally, she turns to me. I brace myself.
Well, it is clean, I suppose. Doesn't look very party-ready. I exhale as quietly as possible and pull out my pad of paper and pen she has me keep. Yes, mother. I was beginning to do it up when you arrived.
Excuses. All I ever get from you.
Glance down. Breathe. I'm sorry, mother. I just didn't have time.
A stinging across my face. I'm on the floor. Ah--my face. She's hit me.
You had plenty of time! I gave you plenty of things to do! They should all be done! How dare you blame me for your--your incompetence!
I don't cry or blubber. This is a usual routine. To dream of escaping these outbursts is to be perfect. More than perfect.
I realize I'm looking down and not at her.
AH. AGH--my shoulder. She- ow- her nails are in my shoulder. Those perfect, look-at-me nails. Red. Now even more red.
YOU LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU, B****! I KNOW YOU CAN'T HEAR! YOU LITTLE B****! YOU CAN'T IGNORE ME! HOW DARE YOU?!
And then she's hitting me. Eyes. Chest. Cheeks. I fall back, twisting, landing face-down on the floor. Gasp. Ah. I can't breathe. Ahhh. Owww. The pain is everywhere. There is no escape from it. I'm sobbing now. There is no stopping it.... There is no escape from it.
She's off me.
I peer up at her. She looks almost confused. Cruelly sympathetic. Her lips and eyebrows say sympathy. Her eyes say malice. Almost pleasure.
Oh, goodness. You're so stupid and clumsy, Kaylei. You've fallen and hurt yourself again. Do stop that crying. You're such a disappointing mess. Alright, well, get up, deary. Go get changed. You've ripped your shirt again.
Come on, get up. Ugh. I struggle to my feet. I look at her.
Yes, sweetie. When you get changed, you can definitely come back and finish decorating. I know you love doing chores for me.
Broken, I nod helplessly and limp towards my room.
I should have run.
YOU ARE READING
Hushed
RandomA deaf girl with a harsh mother struggles to keep her deafness a secret. "I am normal. Can't you tell? Perfectly. Normal. Gorgeous, silent, mysterious. The girls want to be me. Everyone wants to have my mother as theirs. Every guy wants to be with m...
