Hushed

Chapter Thirteen

Dear readers,
I am so so so so soooooo sorry. It has been soooooo long since I updated! Bethbritt, pretty pretty please forgive me? After rereading the past chapters and many thoughts of deleting chapters, I've decided to proceed with what I originally wrote. Enjoy.

The rest of the class seems to fly by and crawl at the same time. At first, it's slow because everybody's asking where I was. How do so many people already know about me fainting? I mean, what the heck? Hopefully nobody will tell their parents. Hopefully none of the parents tell mum. Hush. You can't think about that here. Keep your mask on. Smile. You're fine. You're normal. You're not hurt. You are not allowed to think about her. Or about him.
About....
Jace- nope nope nope nope stop it. If you mess this up, she'll find out. She'll know. You'll never see him again. You'll never see another sign except in the mirror. No.
You. Will. Not. Let. That. Happen.

Soon, reassured that the most "perfect" girl in school wasn't any less perfect, the others left me alone and soon after that, the teacher stopped looking at me as if I fainted on purpose for attention. That left me alone to my thoughts.

I have to stop thinking about him. If I smile around her, she'll know something's up. She'll figure it out and she'll scare him away. She can't. She can't take him away. He will be my secret. From her. She'll find out. How? Nobody knows but him and me. But she knows knows everything. Knew. Past tense. She knew everything. She will not. Cannot. Know. He signed to me.

Hello. My name is Jace and I want to be your friend.

It washes over me again. And again. And again and again. I concentrate on every small motion. The hesitations as he tries to think of the next sign. The shakiness as he fingerspells his own name. Jace. The swift swoop of the J. The firm A. The awkward shift to C. The overly stretched out E, more like a panther paw hand than an E. But, shaky or not, it's definitely Jace. Then he wants to be my friend. The overexaggerated circles for want. The puzzled face, unsure if be was right. The stern point at me. The solid finish, his curved pointer fingers hooking together. Friend. My friend. My friend Jace. One of three. He is Jace. My only friend. My lifeline to hearing world. My first sign conversation. The only one who actually seems to care. My one of three.

My mind jumps to the moment in the hall. The moment when he...

He held my hand. He touched me. Not in a hey-how-are-ya-I-don't-care kinda way. Not in a mean way. It didn't hurt me. It was soft. Barely anything, but certainly, undeniably there. It was almost like.... Light. From the ball room. It was silent and almost normal, but it was warm and comforting. It felt like home, but the home I never had. I want to be back there. In the hall. With him. Not even specifically the hall. Anywhere I could feel the warmth that he emits. Jace. My friend. My lifeline. My one of three. My light that I could touch. I want to talk to him again. I want to hug him. I want to experience it all again.

And that settles it. I have to keep him in my life. She. Will. Not. Take. Him. Away.

So. He's a secret. From her. Which means I'm going to need a battle plan.