Choices {Phan}

Realizations {3}

"So, Phil," Danielle started. "How have you been,"

"I've been okay. How about you?" I asked.

"I'm horrible," She admitted.

"Oh no. What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Well, okay. I'll tell you. I kissed my best friend. Well actually, she kissed me. But I liked it. But I pulled away. But I'm sorry,"

She was crying on the other end of the phone. Why the heck were our stories and lives so similar. Was this real life, or was it an AU?

"Hey, it's okay," I said.

"I'm not a lesbian, just so you know,"

"Do you wanna meet somewhere and talk about this in person?" I asked.

"Yeah. That would be great. Where?" I heard a lot of movement coming from the other line.

"Well, it depends. What do you want the atmosphere to be like?"

"Umm," She started. "Something relaxed and calm. Just the two of us,"

"Wanna come over?"

"Yeah. I'll be there in 5,"

"Okay perfect. See you later,"

I hung up and walked back inside. I still had leaves in my hair from laying down during the call. As I walked in, I saw what appeared to be Dan darting out the door. He was wearing his horned hoodie and it was pulled over his head. He also had a black bag. In any other situation, I would have stopped him to tell him Danielle was coming over, and ask him where he was going, but after everything, it didn't seem like the best thing to do. I quickly tidied up the lounge and kitchen in anticipation for Danielle. I finished with a few minutes to spare, so I sat down on the sofa and started playing Crossy Road.

I'd been playing for a bit, when I heard a knock on the door. I opened it and sure enough, Danielle was standing there. She was wearing black skinny jeans and a red blouse. Her long brown hair falling over her right shoulder. Her usually brown eyes were red and puffy from crying.

"Hey. Come on in," I told her.

"Thanks," She said, stepping inside the house.

She sat down on the two seat sofa and crossed her legs. Her hair seemed messy and her eyes were dull.

"We need to talk," She said to me when I sat down.

"Yeah. We do," I replied, not knowing any other way how.

"Listen, Phil," She started. "I'm not a lesbian. I'm bisexual,"

I didn't mean to, but I let my face fall. Was she breaking up with me? Why?

She saw that my face fell and quickly added, "But, we have something. And I really like you. I'm not just going to throw that away. And even if you hate me now, I'm going to fight for whatever we have,"

"What do we have, Danielle? What are we?" I asked.

"I don't know, Phil? What do you want me to be? Your best friend? Your," She gulped. "Girl friend?" She cringed when she used a pronoun.

"I really like you, Danielle. Like, a lot,"

"What are you saying, Phil?"

"I'm saying," I started. "I want you to be my girlfriend,"

"Really?" She asked, seeming unsure about herself, almost like she was doubting anyone actually wanted to be with her.

"Really. Would you like to know how I'd treat you?" I asked, hoping my explanation would make her believe I truly wanted to be with her.

"Yeah," She said, looking down at her hands.

"Well," I started.

I continued to describe what we would do together, how I'd talk to her, and how I'd act. As I explained, I realized that I was basically describing my current relationship with Dan. Was I making a mistake? Was I supposed to be with Dan? Maybe I'm not straight. I've had my crushes on a fair share of girls, but I've really only had a proper crush on one guy. Because like, how can you not love Ed Sheeran? But do I have a crush on Dan? I think about him all the time, I do practically everything with him, and  I like a girl literally named Danielle. Do I like both of them? I should probably talk to Dan about everything that's happened.

I wrapped up my conversation with Danielle. I very kindly ushered her out with the explanation that my "family was coming in town". I felt bad, but I needed to talk to Dan before anything else. Why didn't I ask where he was going? He probably thinks I hate him now. God Phil, why do you have to be so stupid!? I guess I'll just wait for him here.