Eddsworld oneshots ❤

Alex x soldier! reader-best friends forever

[Do not steal my art! Alex Dark aka The Purple Leader-my main ew!oc ^^ if someone wonders, since it's Alex x reader ^^']

You were walking down the streets, with your AK47 in arms. Everyone know what if they'll see that coat you actually had on, they have to run away. Or else, you would simply shoot them. Your partner, (bff/n) had to take care of strangers if they had to meet James Kyle aka Purple Leader. As you wandered there and there, one girl with eyepatch and robot arm run to you.

"Miss/Mister! I really need to meet with Purple Leader! I mean no charm, but it's private thing...please, lead me to him!"

She looked desperate. As you were good person, but you had to do your work, you still leaded her to your partner. They lead the mysterious girl to the leader.

??? Pov:

As i was doing my paperwork, (bff/n) knocked onto the door. As i said 'come in' one girl with an eyepatch and...robot arm? Lame. These are not cool these days, better are the ones that were printed in 3D. But, guess she likes old times.

"State yourself, civilian"

I said to her as she sat in front of me.

"Um...i am Alex Dark, i came here because i wanted to join the army"

"What do you want to do here? Do you want to be soldier, mechanic, doctor, hacker, guardian of base or what? And be more specyfic about yourself"

"i am 21 years old, i have no siblings, my parents died. I am living with 3 of my friends, one of them passed away after being the Red Leader. I know how to use all types of guns including bazooka and for example AK47, shotguns etc. My aim is very good, because if i would use sniper gun i still have to close one of my eyes...and for fucks sake my right eye is blind...oh, and also i know how to spy on people, i am very good at hacking everything, i am fast, i can stalk whoever i have to, and also i am good at using short distance weapons- i mean shurikens, knifes, and that kind of weapons...and i want to be leader. I know how to lead army."

She said with smirk on her face. I looked at her, clearly annoyed.

"Excuse you, miss, but i am the leader. Do you even know who are you talking to?"

She just yawned and said

"James Kyle. Age- 56 years old. Favorite color- brown. Weight-78 kilograms. Height- 5'6". Both of parents were killed, your sibling Martha too. Christian, catolic. Dislikes alcohol. Have shizofrenia and bipolar. Heterosexual. Do i have to say more?"

I was really shocked when she said exactly everything about me. She stand up, taking something out of her backpocket. It was bb gun. Shit, if she have silencer i am screwed. She pulled the trigger and i felt something in my heart, stomach and then, head.

Alex's Pov:

Wow, that was easy. Good thing he didn't had the coat on, it is really a masterpiece of art. He fall down the chair onto the cold floor, dead. His hat rolled in my direction, so i grabbed it and put it on. It fits perfectly! I suited myself in Purple Army coat and then used automatic control to make ___ and (bff/n) to the office. As i waited for them to come to me i grabbed my bb gun and took AK47 from the wall. I sat on his chair, crossing my legs on the desk. I took out my cigar and light it up. As i smoked slowly i heard knock on the door. I said

"Open!"

___ and (bff/n) come in. They looked at me terrified. ___ pointed a shotgun at me.

Your Pov:

"Nuh-uh!"

She said playfully, pointing AK47 at me, and...bb gun? At (bff/n).

"As the old leader passed away from silent bb gun i decided it would be the best option if i take his job! So here i am, the new Purple Leader, Alex Dark. Don't even try tricks, in this world the only rule it's kill or be killed. And he is definetly dead. Say hello to your new leader, guys/gals"

I looked at (bff/n). She looked at me, then at Alex and saluted. I did the same. As i closed distance between me and my friend i whispered to her

"i thought you checked if she had any guns!"

"I thought you did that before me!"

He/she whispered back.

"If you have something to say, say it loud soldier."

Purple Leader said.

"Uh, i kind of asked why (bff/n) didn't checked if youuu...uh, if LEADER had guns with yourself, your majesty"

"Don't be so formal, i am Alex to both of you, for the rest of the army i am leader. Got it?"

"Yes ma'am! I mean, yes Alex"

I smiled sweating nerwously.

*time skip cuz i ran out of ideas*

After like 2 years you and Alex grew to be close friends. Of course, she was strict and all, but she was not bad after all. A little of psychopath, alcoholic, communist, otaku and gun lover in one! Otaku was good thing, but not at the fact that Alex liked hentai...not that you minded, your mind was mostly made of dick jokes and dank memes. Most of the time both of you commanded to the army at their trainings, changing just for a break, so you or her could train too. Because if you want to be leader you have to be strong. And you were more surprised, because your army was mostly commanded in norwegian, ((because your and Red Army were mixed (sadly Tord passed away, so James took over control) and more than a half of your army was from Red Army, and they were from Norway. )) and Alex could speak to them in norwegian. You could barely make something out of what she said, but still, to you she talked in English. And it was the best to you, because the army had that one guy who translated what she said for others.

You were her favorite soldier. Where ever she went, you were with her. You were the one to command the army if she had some buisness in the world to take care of. You were basically the second leader. You were happy, because she really made the whole world her. And the communism was everywhere. Rights for the women, kids and everyone was the same. And all of the terrorism was instantly removed. No more wars. If someone decided to be rebel and do opposite of what everyone did, that person was also instantly removed, or just simply killed. Your best friend (bff/n) married one of the soldiers, and you lost contact with her. So there was Alex. Your new best friend. You ruled the world till you both died.

Happy end? Idk

-------------------------------------------------------------

I might do a christmas one today... MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!