Both a freak of nature and a creation of mad science, xelymph (atomic symbol "X") is the first ever negative element that we know of. Instead of the normal, average element, xelymph's atoms have one neutron and two electron in the center, with one proton orbiting the nucleus.
This new element was not discovered but in fact created by the now famous Professor Stein Richtofen, nephew of the World War Two's Dr. Edward Richtofen.
"It all started when I was playing around with some hydrogen atoms, the simplest of them all," Professor Richtofen says. "These building blocks had always fascinated me. Then one day, I had a idea. 'What if I switch the places of protons and electrons in an atom?' And so I went to work. It took me two years to finish the project, but I had finally found a way to make them switch.
"When I did, however, it sent out a ripple, pushing me back and destroying all my equipment. Everything started exploding, and I barely made it out alive.
"Then I started hearing that there were new stars popping up everywhere that we can see in space, and that they were all orange - which, if you do not know, there are no such thing as orange stars. Until now."
That's right. When the stars were discovered, scientists immediately went to find out what they were made out of, until the Professor over here got a sample and concluded that they were all made of element -1, xelymph. Tell us, Professor, why did you call the element "xelymph"?
"Actually, it would be incorrect to call xelymph element -1, as elements cannot have a negative atomic number. The correct pronunciation would be negative element 1. As for why I called it xelymph, I named it after the little puppy I had when I was a child. I loved Xelymph, and *sniff* I still miss him."
And is xelymph a gas, like hydrogen and oxygen?
"Actually, Xelymph is a plasma here on Earth, and is the only element that is plasma naturally. You can always tell it is Xelymph because it will always be orange, like neon is red and xenon is blue. By itself, it is incredibly dangerous and has the highest radioactivity out of all the elements. But when fused with other elements, like oxygen, it becomes something much less dangerous. Recently, I have found out that we can mix xelymph and oxygen to make a water-like substance. This substance and water are the exact same, of course, beside the color.
"Anything else we are still finding out. There are plenty of things to do right now."
Wow! So there you have it, folks! A new, manmade element that seems to have many uses. What will become of it? Will we use it for warfare? All this and more soon. I'm Janet Jane, and we'll be back shortly on Fox News.
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