Slow Down

Nude

I keep saying it over and over again in my mind. I opened my eyes wishing that he and his knife were gone and it was all in my imagination.

"Welcome back to reality, I thought I lost you there."

"From now on you have no rights, no place among the world and have lost any sense of identity. From now on I will only refer to you as ... Monster"

He used the knife to cut all my clothes off from my shirt down to my trousers. I am now nude hanging from a ceiling. I am nothing.

I felt cold and vulnerable and weak. There was nothing I could do but wait and repeat the words.

"This next part isn't going to be painful .. For me. As you for you, well, I guess you will tell me. What is like to have no balls?"

He did not crack a laugh or a smile but had a look of hatred. His eye twitched for a second as well.

I had no time to react or to think. I could only panic and struggle as any person would have. He grabbed my genitals hard and furiously started to cut.

"AHHHHHHHH. AHHHHH. WHAT THE FUC- AHHHHHHH"

WHAT IS HAPPENING. I'M NOT HERE THIS IS NOT HAPPENING. I AM NOT HERE AND THIS IS NOT HAPPENING.

Oh my god help me please. Help me. Please for fucks sake help me.

Blood came splattering out all over the place. My body is in relentless pain. That's getting worse and worse.

What is happening

I'm not here.

The shock is making me shake beyond all reason. I tried so hard to break free from my restraints. I was trying everything. I lost my ability to see. The only thing I could hear was my own screams and could feel the endless pain and the strain on my throat, my arms, my legs ... Everything.

I passed out.

"Not so easy!" He smacked me over and over again in order to keep me awake. In order to make me feel the pain.

"What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck is this? U haven't even asked me shit. What the fuck FUCK" another wave of pain came at me and ruined me.

I now know what hell feels like. I was never a believer in such things. But then I met him. And now everything is changed. Every scream was one scream closer to death and to peace. Thankfully this time he let me sleep

...

I opened my eyes and he was no where to be found. I wonder what he does when he leaves the room. Does he think about what he is going to do next to me? Does he have a normal life? Is this some sort of sick obsession he can't control? Was it revenge?

I have to hold on to these moments, moments of being alone. I had to look forward to them. I don't know how many are left.

I hesitantly look down at the floor. I could not make out colours but there was a darker patch of black beneath me which I could only assume was my blood.

My restraints to the pole suddenly became loose and I felt my hands slowly slipping through ... I know I'm going to fall - it was inevitable. I guess he planned it or maybe it's just a coincidence. I don't care either way.

My hands slipped through and my feet landed in my own blood were I slipped and fell on my front. I hadn't eaten or slept for quite some time now. I had no motivation to move. I just closed my blood stained eye lids and fell asleep.