Slow Down

Madness is like gravity - all it takes is a little push!

He left the room shortly afterwards but didn't leave me in the chair. I was back up hanging.

This was my current situation.

I'm practically paralyzed and still hurting from my injures. My arms have been strained because I've been hanging for so long. Bit how long? There was no way I could know. My head is constantly dizzy and swirls round and round. I'm surprised I managed to get a word out before.

I don't know what's worse though. The fact that this man has made no sense. It's like he only wants me to feel pain without knowing anything. Wasn't that the whole point of torture?

Or is the worst part that I don't think I can last much longer. I can't say how much I can take. This was hell.

I've hit the breaking point. Any verbal gain I got was not worth it. Maybe I could have shut up. I don't know anymore. I could barely hear myself breath in and out.

How long was he going to be. I fell like my life is slowly slipping away.

But it isn't is it?

I'm at the point where he is only just keeping me alive. I try and sleep.

BANG BANG BANG.

What the fuck. I woke worried and terrified. Was he coming?

Was he coming?

I couldn't look round or rotate my head. I could only see darkness.

I've never been so afraid. What is happening.

I force my alerted eyes to close once more. Hopefully it was just a dream.

...

BANG BANG BANG

There it is again. What was it. My mind must be playing tricks.

BANG BANG BANG.

WHAT THE FUCK. I could feel my heart pumping harder and harder which made my injuries hurt even more. The headache was unbearable. The constant ringing in the ears. The blurred vision.

Was he trying to keep me awake? Or was he even doing this? Was this my insanity? Is this what it feels like?

All I could do is hang here and wait. Just hang here and wait. Every second that goes by, is one second closer to death - to peace.

BANG BANG BANG

Ok. Calm down Alim. Everything is fine. It's just a trick. He's trying to break you and are you going to let him now? No. You're not. You're stronger than he is. If he were in my position he would have broken ages ago right?

Right?

He's pathetic. He's evil. No one deserves this. Why was his face like that? Was it a mask?

It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Everything is fine.

BANG BANG BANG

EVERYTHING IS FINE. ok. Calm. Calm. Calm.

It's ok. Death can't be far away. Death can't be far away.