Fall - A Rocky Lynch Story

Chapter 15

"Are you sure we shouldn't go ahead with a doctor's appointment?" I looked at Rocky worriedly in bed.
He sighed heavily and opened one eye into the bright room, "If it would really make you feel better..." He mumbled, "I think we should just stick with therapy until things change or get worse."
"How could it get worse?" I scoffed, "I hate this for him."
"I hate this for you." Rocky barely sat up and checked the time, "It's 7:15, the kids have the day off today because it's a teacher work day, Ellie is somehow still in her crib asleep, and yet you're up. And you barely slept any last night."
"I get nervous about it at night." I shrugged.
"Lisa said Mase has been doing well in his therapy." He said, "I think it's time to tell the older kids."
"I don't  want them to think he's any different." I propped my head up my on hand and looked at Rocky, "He's still their brother."
"But if they know then they can help us and they will be more careful and not do things that make him upset. Carter's been asking me what's wrong with you, Jules," Rocky took my hand.
"I don't know what my deal is." I shook my head, "I cry all the time. It's like," I paused, "I think I'm just worried that there's something more they haven't diagnosed him with and it's like a part of me just wished that I could take it away because I'm his mom..." My eyes welled up with tears again.
"Juliette," He sighed and pulled me into his bare chest, "Listen to me, I've told you before, you can't control this. Nothing you could have done would have changed this. It just happens."
There was a quiet knock on the door and then it opened slowly, "Hey..." Carter said quietly, "Can Avelyn and I come in?"
"Yeah, you guys," I sniffled and wiped my eyes, "Come on in."
"Mommy, why were you crying?" Avelyn asked me worriedly as she climbed up onto our bed.
Carter sat on the edge of the bed with his feet almost touching the floor, "Avelyn woke me and wanted to talk to you guys."
"What about sweetie?" I asked her.
"Are you having another baby?" She asked me.
My eyes widened and Carter looked up at me seriously, "Are you guys joking?" I scoffed and shook my head, "No, honey, no I'm, uh, I'm not, why?"
"Because," Avelyn said, "You've been crying a lot, and you've been rocking Mason and Ellie to sleep again."
"Guys, no, I'm not having a baby." I smiled, "But," I looked at Rocky, "As long as you're both in here I guess I should tell you what's going on."
Carter's face turned concerned and Avelyn curled up next to Rocky to listen to me. I took a deep breath and told myself I was gonna make it through without tears, "Your brother Mason," I told them, "You know how sometimes he cries for no reason?"
"He's four," Carter told us.
"We know, Car, just listen, okay?" I asked him politely, "You know how he bit you when you touched his face Avelyn?"
"Mhm." She nodded.
"And you know how he doesn't like to have a lot of loud noises like the TV or people around?" I asked them both. They nodded and I continued, "Well, it seems like Mason has something called anxiety..." I tried to explain it in the simplest way possible, "And that means he gets scared easily by certain things like touch, or too much going on in a room, or loud noises. Does that make sense?"
They both nodded and Carter spoke up, "Why?"
Rocky took my hand and started talking so I could calm down, "We don't know." He said honestly, "But he's going to a special teacher that is going to help him and we're going to help him and that means you guys need to be responsible."
Avelyn perked up, "That's my favorite word."
He chuckled and nodded, "I know it is. So that means we need you guys to help keep Ellie from doing things that hurt Mason, like turning the TV up loudly or getting out too many toys at one time. And another thing you can do to help us if Ellie is doing something so we can stop it."
"And what can we do?" Carter asked, "So he doesn't cry or anything?"
"Well, its inevitable he's gonna cry. He's four." Rocky said to them, "but we've found that if you tell him you're there before you touch him he doesn't cry. So when you go into a room you can say, 'Hey Mase, i'm in here okay?' and wait for him to answer you and then if you want to play with him, tell him again, 'Hey masey, I'm gonna come play close to you okay?' because it helps him feel more comfortable, okay?" Rocky looked at both of them, "And most importantly, if Mason says don't touch him, don't touch him, do you both understand?"
"What about you guys?" Carter looked like he was really trying to understand all of this, "How can we help you guys?"
"If you see Mase doing anything out of the ordinary, you need to tell us." I replied, "and most of all just keep treating him like your little brother."
Avelyn sighed, "Is he okay?"
"He's gonna be okay." I told her, "We might have to see a doctor, but they're gonna make him as good as he can be."
"Okay." She nodded, "Does this mean I can get a puppy?"
Rocky grabbed her and tickled her, "And why does this mean you can get a puppy?"
"Well," She giggled, "If Mommy's not having a baby then we have room!" She stated and laughed.
I rolled my eyes and sighed, "Alright, who wants breakfast?"
"Me!" Carter perked up.
"Me too!" Said Avelyn through giggles.
"Alright. Let's move it." I laughed and walked out with my big kids.
* * *
"Babe- have you ever heard of autism spectrum disorders?" I asked him as we sat quietly in our living room. It was a quiet Friday night with the rain going outside. Ellie and Mason were fast asleep, Carter was out with his friends at the movies and wasn't coming home until 10, and Avelyn was spending the night at Ross and Andi's for a special niece sleepover with her cousins Brooke and Alice.
"Yes I have," Rocky nodded and handed me a glass of wine. I swished it around and read to him, "It says he could have symptoms of that..."
"Baby, according to the internet he has symptoms of everything. Hell, if you put in my every day feelings into WebMD it'll tell you I have 6 months to live." He sat down next to me, "Relax a bit..."
"I'm trying but it's hard." I sighed and put my head on his shoulder.
"What if he does have autism?" I asked him.
"Then we will cross that bridge when we come to it..." He kissed my head, "Like you said this morning, he's still a little boy. He is a brother and a son and a little boy and he will always be that no matter what they diagnose him with."
I took a deep breath and let it out, "You're right..."
I heard the front door begin to open and Rocky hopped up, "Who the hell is that?" He asked.
"I'm sorry man," I heard Ryland's voice. "I just used our key... I didn't wanna bother you."
"So you decided to scare the hell out of us?" Rocky rolled his eyes and made his way to the door, "The hell Ry, did you walk here you're soaked." He laughed.
"I did actually." He said matter of factly.
"You walked at night in the rain to come to our house... alone?" I stood up and Rocky made his way upstairs to get him dry clothes. "Ryland..." I furrowed my eye brows, "Did you guys have a fight?"
"How'd you know?" He smiled sheepishly. Rocky gave him some of his clothes and he excused himself to go change quickly.
"They had a fight..." I told Rocky.
"Oh," He nodded, "That makes a bit more sense."
Ryland came out of the bathroom with his wet clothes in a pile, "Just throw them into the dryer and press start." I told him and he nodded. He came back into the living room moments later and sat down next to us.
"Beer?" Rocky asked.
"No thanks, I'm good..." He sighed, "Can I ask you guys..." He trailed off, "Have either of you ever said something really stupid that you regret to each other?"
We both laughed and nodded, "Yeah..." I said.
"For sure." Rocky shrugged. "What'd you say?"
"Well it was kind of both of us..." Ryland made a face and shook his head, "She told me she doesn't think I'm smart enough with my finances..."
"Oh..." Rocky nodded, "And what'd you say?"
"I told her she was cheap. And that I enjoy my life." He said sourly.
"and that equated to her thinking I don't want kids, because she said, 'Oh so that's why you were hesitant because you love your lifestyle more than having a kid or two.' which is so not true," He shook his head.
"But you called her cheap?" I furrowed my brow and shook my head, "Not smart Ry... She's frugal. And that's a good thing."
"I know it is!" He replied, "I'm just stupid and didn't think before I spoke. And so she said she thought I needed to think about what I really wanted and so I said I was gonna go here and work it out with you guys but then when I left she locked the door behind her like she always did and the only keys I had with me were the keys to each of our houses and I was too angry to go back inside and get the keys to my car so I walked here and it started raining and it took me two hours to get here."
I shook my head, "And have you talked to Karlee?"
"I left my phone too." He told us.
Rocky rubbed his eyes, "Well you should call her and apologize." He said, "And secondly, you do splurge on stupid shit sometimes Ryland, you gotta admit, your watch collection totals over $40,000. And with kids, you can't spend that kind of money on things other than them."
"I know that." Ryland nodded, "I want what she wants. And I want a family, but I'm gonna just need help budgeting I guess."
"You make good money Ry, it won't hurt you too much." Rocky assured him, "But take us for example, we've got four kids. Three out of four are at a school that costs tuition and we're about to add a fourth, not to mention insurance, their clothes, so much more food, toys, school supplies, doctors bills, Avelyn keeps begging for a puppy, Mason's gonna have to have a special doctor now..." He was babbling.
"Woah, woah, what, why?" Ryland looked completely confused.
Rocky closed his eyes and looked at me, "I didn't mean to say that..."
"What's up with Little Mase?" He asked us again, "Is he okay?"
"He's okay..." I told Ryland, "He's just got some sensory issues we're getting him to therapy for."
"Like what? Like a disability?" Ryland was genuinely concerned.
"Not really... This doesn't mean he's disabled, it doesn't define him." Rocky told him seriously.
"Absolutely not, but what can I do?" Ryland asked.
I smiled and my eyes welled up with tears. "Forgive her." Rocky rubbed my back, "It's been a rough week."
"I wanna hug you." I choked out and stood up to hug my brother in law.
"Why?" He laughed and brought me into his arms.
"Because three years ago before you came to live with us, you would not care nearly as much about our kids are you do now." I hugged him tightly, "You're so grown up." I let go of him, "Ryland I met you when you were 18 honey, do you know how much you've changed since then."
"I'm sure a lot." He smiled and I sat back down.
"I want you to tell me about Mason, but first I need to call Karlee." Ryland told me, "Where's a phone?"
"In the kitchen on the counter..." I told him and I took a sip of my wine. I rested my head back onto Rocky's shoulder.
"You know..." Rocky took my hand in his, "I think we raised him really well." He laughed out loud.
I laughed and wiped my eyes, "I definitely have to agree."