Chapter 26

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There was a race against the clock to finish all of the bachelorette party preparations. I headed over to Rydel's place with a bunch of bags as soon as Stormie and Mark got to my house. The kids were more than happy to hang out with their grandparents. Carter made plans to hang with his guy friends for the day. I gave all my kids a hug and kiss before heading out.

I tapped on Rydel's door as I pushed it open she came down the stairs with Lee and put him in his bouncy chair. "I took the whole day off work to help with this," she laughed, "so where do we start?"

I handed her a cake pan in the shape of a penis. When Rydel rolled her eyes, I giggled. "Get ready for a lot of that," I told her. "Tonight is about to be the most obnoxious at-home bachelorette party ever. Where are the girls?" I asked when I noticed her house was pretty empty.

She shrugged. "Ellington told them to walk to your house. He's all about them being more independent lately."

"Ahh," I nodded as I started to unpack more items onto her dining room table. "Well, we better get started."

We spent a good chunk of the morning making the treats that took a bit longer. Rydel made the best -- and most realistic -- penis cake I had ever seen. I spent most of that time making a variety of Jell-O shots in the same shape. There were multiple flavors of them, in different sizes. Once I had them all mixed, I sat them aside in the fridge to set.

When we broke for lunch, we called Ryland at work and had him answer some questions for the trivia game we planned. For a few other games, we put our artistic skills to good use. One of them involved drawing different phallus-shaped items for a game I found called 'Pin the Junk on the Hunk'. By the time the end of the afternoon rolled around, her entire house was covered in a variety of penises.

Rydel hesitantly went to drop Lee off with her parents. It was her first time being away from her new baby boy for more than a few hours and she was nervous. It was too bad that she was breastfeeding so I couldn't get her drunk enough to forget her worries. We were just going to have to distract her with the fun I had in store for everyone.

Karlee was the first to arrive, and Andi was right behind her. They started to look over all of the food and games and were rolling their eyes at all of the junk. They were obviously too sober for this, and that was something I was proud to say I could fix. Jenna arrived just as Rydel returned from my place, and it was officially time to get the party started.

"Was this your idea, Juli?" Andi asked as she picked up a bag of penis necklaces and whistles. "It's like you bought out the entire adult boutique!" She put a couple of necklaces on, one of the hats, and popped a whistle into her mouth. "How do I look?"

"Hot," I nodded and got my own penis attire on and tossed some to Jenna and Karlee. Jenna smiled and placed them down by her purse. I had a feeling it was going to take her a few shots in order to loosen up a bit. I tilted my head at Karlee. "You're the bride, so penis up my friend."

Karlee blushed but laughed and did as she was told. "So are all we going to do tonight is play with dicks?" she asked. "Because I do enough of that at home."

We all gasped. "Karlee you slut," Rydel pointed to her and doubled over at her joke.

"Girls!" I called them to the kitchen where I had the tray of shots. "Everyone has to do at least one, minus Del," I told them and held the tray out. I took an orange one and popped it into my mouth. Everyone snickered and picked up their own.

"Best tasting dick I've ever had in my mouth," Andi nodded and we all broke out into laughter.

And that's basically how the entire night went. Every time anyone ate any of the genital shaped foods, there were a bunch of dick puns thrown around. We were pretty buzzed after an hour had passed and we decided to play the first game, which was groom trivia.

"Okay Karlee," I clapped my hands together and grabbed my index cards. "We're going to ask you questions Ry answered already and we're going to see how well you actually know him. If you get it right, we all have to drink. But if you get it wrong, you have to drink. Got it?"

"This should be interesting," Rydel giggled.

"I want to ask the first question!" Andi shouted and cleared her throat to make a point. "Where was your first kiss with Ryland?"

We all leaned in and watched her think. "I think it was in Juliette's living room," she furrowed her brows.

Andi nodded. "That was an easy one. Everyone knows that story." We all took a sip of our margaritas. "Okay, who's next?"

"I got this," Rydel piped up. "Karlee, what's Ry's favorite part of your body?"

"Oooooooh!" I chuckled. "I bet you're never going to guess this one."

"Ummm..." Karlee took a drink before she even answered. "Probably my nose or something silly like that. I actually don't know."

"Nope!" Rydel and I said at the same time.

"He said his favorite part of your body is the small of your back," Rydel read off of the card and tilted her head with a smile. "Cute. But you gotta drink, girly."

Karlee blushed and took a drink before Jenna started to read the next card. "What is Ryland looking forward to the most about the wedding?"

"Oh come on, everyone knows this," Karlee rolled her eyes. "Say it with me ladies. One, two, three--"

"The sex after!" we all hollered loudly and broke out in obnoxious, intoxicated laughter.

We went around the circle asking questions until we reached the last card. Karlee actually knew Ryland pretty well. Some of the things that surprised all of us -- people who have known him for ages -- were easy for her. They really were meant to be. We played a few drunken arounds of 'Pin the Junk on the Hunk' before we all started to get texts from our guys.

"Riker called an Uber and is picking up the kids and then me," Jenna slurred as she read from her phone. "He's so considerate! I should tell that to him, hold on." She hit reply and her fingers grazed over the keypad. The text ended up coming out like 'uouyre soo consinderietae i luvei yuo" and she giggled as she hit send. "There, done." It was always fun to see Jenna drunk, since it was such a rare occurrence.

"Andi, Karlee, I can drive both of you home. I have to pick up the kids and Ellington anyway," she said and the girls nodded, texting their guys about the plans. "And then I get to drive Ell BACK to Ross's to get the other car tomorrow. I told him they should have all just car pooled."

I waited with Jenna at Rydel's until she got picked up, and then walked my way home. My balance was awful and I almost face planted a couple of times. When I reached my house, I was so relieved. Rocky had already sent his parents home and my house was quiet. I stumbled up the stairs barely and had to sit on the top step and close my eyes to stop the room from spinning.

Rocky must have heard me because when I opened my eyes, he was standing in front of me. "Did you have fun?" he chuckled. He had obviously sobered up a bit from the bachelor's party. He was freshly showered and in only his boxer briefs. "I was waiting for you. To make sure you got home safely, of course."

"Of course." I pouted at him and reached my hands up. "Help me please." He grabbed onto my hands and helped me stand, then lifted me up like he did when he carried me over the threshold. "You're so strong," I whispered to him as I felt his biceps. "That's so sexy. God, you're sexy."

"And you're drunk," he laughed. He carried me to our room and sat me on the bed before helping me get my jeans off. I took my bra off, but that was about all I could do. I decided I was just going to sleep in my t-shirt for the night.

"You're so sweet," I hummed to him. "You always take care of me."

"I love you, Juli." He brushed my hair out of my face and kissed my forehead tenderly. "Go to bed, baby."

"I love you, Rocky," I mumbled and pulled the covers over me. It didn't take long before I was out cold.


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