my sweet-awful life

Blair

"Blair get up. You know we have people coming. We have to prepare.." I heard my mom call from somewhere in the house.

I wasn't sleeping. No. I'd already woken up, brushed my teeth, grabbed a snack from the fridge then got back to my room before everyone else woke.
I planned to stay there for a few hours...You know maybe until the visitors go.

Please don't judge me. I just don't do conversation pretty well.

"...and by we I mean you" she finished, now in my room

"Only Me?" When she only looked at me I continued "what about your other three kids?"

"Well non of my other three kids are living me in three days. So we are going to buy some snacks for our guests while you.." she faked a smile and looked around "...slave away to prepare for them"

She was clearly enjoying this.

My mother has been so sentimental about me going away to university. She tried to hide it but I could see she wished there was something else she could do to make me stay.
I am the first born of the family of four kids, two girls and two boys, so she's never really had to deal with letting go of her children. I don't blame her.
Even her eyes showed she wasn't ready.

"With all of them?"

"Yeah. You know, just the way it is going to be when you are gone"

I sighed in frustration. They had been doing this to me for so long. They say it's their goodbye. I was really tired and as much as i hated going away from home, this situation had me longing to go. As soon as possible.

"Mom! This is not fair. I..."

"Bye bye honey, be done before we get back." And with that she left

I fell on my back on top of my bed and groaned in frustration and after kicking my pillows off my bed I got up and started to the kitchen.

❤
"Blair, Barbra, Justin, Jeremy?" Mom called from somewhere in the house.

"Yes mom?" We replied at the same instant.

"Come here and greet the visitors, they are wondering where you are"

I got off my bed and walk out my room to meet my siblings in the passageway approaching my room. It was the last or the first of bedrooms depending on where you are coming from. Now it was the last leading us to the living room. We all cramped up near my room and nobody dared to walk past it.

"You go first Jeremy. You are good with people" I said

"No. Barbra must go first."

"Hey. Why me. Justin should"

"Not a chance, Blair should go first. She is the bigger one"

Oh, they just had to pull that one out.

"Yes!!" They all whispered together.

I looked at them incredulously as they started to push me towards the living room.

I don't like being called the 'the bigger one' really. There's nothing to show for it.
This three don't even listen to a word I say, My parents treat us Like quadruples. She even buys us matching clothes sometimes ( the boys and girls separately, though sometimes she makes sure the colours are matching), saying there were so beautiful and she didn't want anyone to say she didn't get him/her anything.
and I can't even defend them.
I remember this day my siblings and I where walking together from school when some guy my age came over to us and tried to scare my siblings with a milipede. They all screamed and started running in different directions. They are afraid of them, we all are.
I couldn't say anything to the guy, I to was afraid of that thing so I just walked faster. They knew the where we were going.
The guy made a mistake of coming to me and saying "that was cool right? Look at your siblings, they are all afraid of this little thingy" he laughed and wiggled it in my eyes. I tried to stay calm but I ended up running too. Karma.
My siblings and I only met when we got home...we'd used different ways to get there.
So there's really no reason for me to be called 'the big sister'. No.
Beside, everyone is two years younger than the other.

"Okay. Don't push me"

I took a few deep breathe but the my mom's voice disturbed me making me fall into the living room.

"There you are, does it have to take ages just to come from your room?"

I smiled shyly since all eyes were on me.

I went and sat down on the carpet since the sofas were all occupied, my siblings did they same.

"Afternoon everyone" I Said looking at no-one.

"Oh good afternoon Blair, we thought we should come and see the big girl who made the family proud" my aunt Candice said.
I smiled at her and started playing with the carpet.

"Yeah. You made us all proud and you set a good example for your brother's and sister" a snort came from somewhere in the room and I new it was from one of my siblings.

"Oh how you've all grown." My grandma spoke

"You people don't want to visit people. You want to come on my funeral?"

No. I want to get out of this room.

Don't get me wrong I love my family, but this conversing thing really wasn't my thing. Even with family other than my siblings, mother and father.

I do believe they understand though.
Even with their futile attempts now and then to make me social, they appreciate me for me.

I gawked as i listened to grandma's speech addressing how she was dying soon and that we should visit and somewhere I just stopped listening.

"I want water" Stephen, my aunt Roxanne's son said to me.

I've never been so happy to do something for someone. It was my golden ticket out of this place.
I couldn't just leave for my room, lest they would think I was hating their presence which was not true. I just could not seem to get myself in the conversation and so I stood in an awkward place.

Even my siblings, but it was everyman for himself.

"You want water honey, come with me"

I got up telling everyone what I'm going to do.
I could feel my siblings glaring After me because they knew what I was up to. I made an evil grin as i proceeded to the kitchen.

After the kid drank water I told him to go back then I went to my room.

"Phew! I thought I'd never see you again"