Not Worth It

Nine

My mind felt fuzzy as I tried to remember why I came to the art room. I drew a blank and decided to head back to lunch.

When I arrived back at my table, everyone was staring. "What did Mr. Dark and Brooding have to talk to you about?" Charlie asked with an inquisitive tone.

"What?" I asked, I had no idea who she was talking about. I thought back to 10 minutes ago. My mind was still blank. Why couldn't I remember? All I remembered was being in the art. There was no clue in my mind as to how I ended up there.

They were all still staring at me and Jules decided to rephrase the question, "Why did James come and whisk you away?" I still had no idea who they we all talking about.

"Who?" I ask meekly. Charlie rolls her eyes before she speaks.

"Don't act so naïve. You know exactly who we are talking about. You were just with him 10 minutes ago." Instead of responding, I decide I need some air. Something weird is happening.

"I have to go," I said quietly before standing up and rushing off. I decide to head outside and hope that it isn't against school rules. Instead of testing my luck and going out the front door, I duck out a side door and leave it slightly propped so I have a way to get back in.

I suck in the fresh air. I didn't realize how stuffy it had been inside. I lean against the wall and slowly slide to the ground. My mind still felt fuzzy and I was desperate to figure out what was going on. Why couldn't I remember? Nothing like this had ever happened to me before. It's like a whole chunk of time was sliced from my memory. I remember being at lunch and then being the art room. I have no idea who this boy is that they were talking about or why he would want to take me to the art room.

I feel like I am going crazy.

I heard the faint sound of a bell that much have wafted through the slightly ajar door. I pushed myself back to my feet and went back inside. The halls were already full of people and I easily slipped into the crowd. My next class was nearby and I arrived quickly.

The glance around the mostly empty room before sliding into my seat by the window. The rest of the class slowly trickles in as the minutes tick by. I spot Zach as soon as he enters the room and he appears to notice me as well. He makes a beeline for me desk. I look up at him and he has a worried expression of his face.

"What happened with James? Are you okay?" His voice was full of concern. My chest swells with panic when he mentions to unfamiliar name, but I push it down quickly. I plaster a smile onto my face before I say a word.

"Nothing happened" I say. He doesn't look convinced so I do my best to reassure him. "I'm fine, I promise." I widen my plastered on smile and this seems to appease him enough for him to leave me for his seat in the back of the room. As class begins, I feel like something is missing. I look around the room and notice an empty desk. I wonder who is supposed to be here that isn't. I get a weird feeling that things aren't right, but shake it off quickly and try and listen to Mr. Bellfort.

***

I drive home as quickly as I can, my knuckles white against the steering wheel. After what seems like forever, I pull up to my drive way. Neither of my parent's cars are in the drive way so I assume I am home alone.

Once inside, I walk past the kitchen and head straight for the stairs that lead to my bedroom. I flop onto my bed and let out an exacerbated sigh.

Things are going just swell. I thought moving would be a great new start for me, but my urges are as strong as ever and now I am experiencing blackouts. Super fucking swell. Just then my stomach let out a hungry roar and I realize that I hadn't eaten lunch. I trudge my way slowly back downstairs and stop in front of the fridge. I pull the door open and groan at the upsetting lack of food.

I think back to my drive home and remember a cute looking diner. I decide that sounds perfect. I head up to my room, change into my favorite pair of ripped boyfriend jeans and a band tee and then head out the door. My mind wanders during the drive.

The hole in my memory is still bugging me, and I am determined to get back those missing minutes.

I pull up to the diner, it is much busier than I was expecting. I notice someone backing out and drive over to snatch the spot. I park quickly and head inside. Once I am through the doors, I notice a boy sitting in a booth in the back. He looks dark and mysterious. Before I can look away, he looks up and we make eye contact.

That's when I feel it again. The feeling that I have lost something. I decidedly march over to the table, determined to get it back and hoping that this dark boy is the key.