~Always~

Returns and Remembrances

Despite the throbbing in Severus' head and the constant ache reappearing throughout his body, Severus slept well and for once, and he had a pleasant dream that wasn't filled with death and disaster.

It was a warm day, and Severus was walking along a beach, the water and the sky were blue. The grass was green, and the sand was pleasantly warm. Everything was perfect.

"Beautiful day isn't Sev." Severus whipped his body around and saw the woman he had been thinking about every day since that night. The sight of her emerald green eyes and red hair caught his breath; she was beautiful. "Lily? What are you-" Snape realised that if he was dreaming he didn't have long with Lily, even if she was real or not so instead of questioning he would just enjoy the moment. "Yes, it is a beautiful day." But before he could enjoy the moment for too long he had to know if it was really her standing before him.

"This is a dream, isn't it?" It sounded as though Severus' mind was made up and he was disappointed.

"Not exactly Sev, you see I am a spirit with unfinished business which means I can roam until I finish what I need to do. After all this time I have finally been able to get into your dream, every other time I've tried, you shut me out."

"Oh Lily, believe me, I didn't mean-" Severus was baffled how could he possibly shut her out, all he wanted was to see her again

"- not intentionally. Your guilt stopped you from letting anyone change your mind about anything; that means that I could not intercept your thoughts and visit your dreams.. until now. Now you or someone has helped change your view; you've let down your guard. We can finally be together." Lily went to put her hand on Severus' shoulder, but he quickly moved away turning from her.

"No, don't touch me. I don't deserve you, Lily, if only... you have no idea what I have done!" A single tear fell down Severus' cheek.

"Sev, don't be ridiculous! I know about everything... the prophecy and Voldemort.... spirits can see the past and the present." Suddenly Severus felt Lily's arms embrace him from behind, he slowly turned and held Lily tightly against his chest scared to let her go again. "I've missed you Sev. My only friend. Don't feel guilty over something you cannot change. I know you never meant to hurt me."

"But I did- I did hurt you, I betrayed you, and you died for it." Slowly tears fell down Severus' cheeks

"No, Sev, you never betrayed me, and I died to save Harry, and I would do it again in a heartbeat. Nothing you could have done would have prevented that. I had only two choices that night, to live and see my only baby be obliterated, or die and save him. You must be able to see that I could only consider one. I don't regret it and neither should you."

"I tried- I tried to save you- I did everything I could to bring you back but-" Severus began only to be cut off

"I know" Lily held Severus closer to her. "But nothing could have saved me that night Sev, I knew what was going to happen, and the only thing that I do regret is that by following that road I had to hurt you and Harry in the process."

"No Lily, it was I who left you, I should never have followed the road that I took. It changed me and turned me-" Lily put a finger to his lips

"You were never one of them Sev; you still aren't. I know you, and I can see it in your heart and soul that you could never have been one of them."

"How can you possibly know that Lily?" Severus demanded an answer bitterly; Severus was letting his emotions speak for him

"You risked your life for us Sev, what other possible redemption do you need?" Lily gave Severus a soft smile and pushed a stray hair behind his ear and caressed his cheek. "I forgave you many many years ago; now you must learn to do the same."