shine - grayson dolan

0.50 «Grayson Dolan»

[edited]

I left the hospital late that night, my first time in a while. This time no one even had to ask me, I was the one who had decided to leave. I couldn't stand being that room for one more fucking second. 

I had collapsed straight on my bed that night, and tears had flowed until my pillow was soaked and my eyes felt dry. 

I missed Emmy.

*  *  *  *

The Samuels family had spent the following week organizing the funeral. I helped them a little, but mostly stayed away. I couldn't be there without thinking of Emmy, and that brought back too many memories.

So that it was why it surprised me when Elliot asked me to come over one day, "It won't be long, I promise. I think my mum just wants to ask you something, I'm actually not too sure."

"Of course," I had agreed. 

I now rang the doorbell of the Samuels house. I couldn't help but feel disappointed when it wasn't Emmy greeting me with a bright smile, but instead Mr. Samuels greeting me with a sad one.

"Hello, Grayson, come on in, son."

I walked in towards the dining room, where the table was filled with old pictures and plans for the ceremony taking place this weekend. "Grayson, sweetie, how are you holding up?" Mrs. Samuels hugged me tightly.

She was petite and thin, just like her daughter, and her embrace felt just like Emmy's, as if she was almost using me to support herself. I tightly hugged her back.

"I'm holding up, Mrs. S, how about you all?"

She brushed my concern off with a bitter smile, "Just the same. I feel Elliot and Evan have been taking it the hardest - especially Evan - apart from you. They refuse to eat or leave the house. And they haven't been tolerating any well-wishers who've come and visited. Just stayed in their rooms all day," she explains.

I grab her hand, attempting to comfort her, "I'll go talk to them later, I'm sure they need some sort of distraction."

"Thank you, Grayson. I think you might need one too," she looks at me pointedly.

I felt especially bad for Elliot and Evan. They had been strong and hadn't said a single thing all throughout the last two months, almost as if they were ignoring it. Everything must have hit them like a truck. 

It felt weird not to be able to say the Three E's, as we sometimes jokingly called them. They weren't the Samuels twins, they were triplets, and they always would be.

"Anyway, darling, I wanted to ask you a question."

I nodded, telling her to go right ahead.

"Would you be willing to make a speech at Emmy's...funeral?" she hesitated during the last part, "Just a little one. Elliot and Evan have both refused, and if you don't want to, that's totally fine, but-"

"I'll do it," I cut in.

She look surprised at my quick decision, "Grayson, honey, you should take some time to think about this. It can be very hard, you know."

"No, I'll definitely do it. It's the absolute least I could do for Emmy," I confirm.

She rubs a hand up and down my back, "Wonderful. Would you like to stay and eat something? We'll be having dinner in an hour or so."

I shook my head, "No thank you, Mrs. S, I should be getting home. I'll just say goodbye to El and Ev."

"Right, of course."